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REUPLOADED. I removed some details for security reasons. Some of you read the details that were essential. I hope you understood my situation.
I want to tell everyone that I've been wanting to announce my retirement from the space for a few months now, and today that day arrived.
I've had the toughest months I've ever had.
The truth is, I don't feel the same motivation I felt before, and I know this isn't an excuse, but I really don't have any motivation for this space or for creating art, and believe it or not, this is vitally important when creating it. The latest art I've created has forced me to do it. I no longer care about the money you offer. I have people in my DMs who have written me time and time again for commissions, but I just don't have the motivation anymore. It's not about the money. I really just sit in front of the computer and spend hours staring at a blank canvas with no desire to draw.
This started a long time ago, slowly. The reason I created Rare Labs was to stop creating art and start directing. This way I would focus more on artistic direction, providing an employment and development opportunity to emerging artists, and taking NFT art to another level.
Rare Apepes would be the magnificent opening for the RareLabs company. Rare Apepes would be the emblem and the reference to the artistic result we sought to project in the space, and everything was going swimmingly.
However, for some reason, I got caught up in the Rare Apepes project, which I initially liked, since I love memetic art and the narrative we create behind the brand. It was also Rarelabs' responsibility to continue creating art exclusively for the brand.
But at some point, everything started to boil down to corporate meetings, decisions that didn't make me feel more motivated, failed decisions, a loss of focus, and little by little, my creative side was dulled by formality. I always stayed away from this because deep down, I understood that it usually kills anyone's creative side.
Creativity is something that motivates me, and I liked to venture into projects more for the motivation it provided than for the money.
So I ended up being dragged down by the responsibility and pressure of addressing people's expectations and complaints overriding my principles that made me grow in this space, which are the love of creativity and the freedom to experiment with new ideas.
I had to suppress all of that. After all, I'm the person behind the project, so I had to keep going. Then, with time, reflection, and conversations with the other founder, we came to the conclusion that we should create something that truly motivated us, since the excess of corporate work was really draining me.
RAK3022: This was the Phoenix project. Creating a video game was always a dream of mine, no matter how small it may seem or how few resources we have. Creating a game is one of my most cherished dreams. And that's when I spoke with K to propose this idea for a video game where I would help with the creative direction. Once we were able to confirm this, we hired my friend Artists, who would be (and is) the creative mind behind the game's development, and the programmer, who writes the code. And even though we were a small team making video games, I know OFA well enough to know it would make a great game.
As I began to see the results of this game, I completely fell in love with this part of Rare Apepes, and when the lore was developed, everything began to connect. For me, everything was starting to fit with my principles: the narrative, the creativity, and the artistic direction. For me, this would be THE PROJECT that would take Rare Apepes back to the top. And this inspired the next step, Apepe Rebirth.
Everything seemed to be going swimmingly. The motivation to continue bringing this game to life was reawakening in me; I was even already imagining the second installment... and that's when the thing I least expected to happen to me happened...
Everyone knows about the situation in Venezuela. I've always been very focused on what I do, so I didn't pay much attention to the political issues around me. I was only focused on developing my dreams. I always stayed out of it because of the consequences this entails, not only for you, but also for your family.
One day, I was traveling to my hometown to visit my family and noticed a car following me. I thought it was a coincidence, but it wasn't. Wherever I was going, this car was following me, so I got scared. I went to pick up my wife, who was with my mother-in-law and my daughter. I hurried to get them, my daughter, and my wife, into the car. On my way home, the car was still behind me. A new car. It couldn't be just any criminal. If it was a criminal, he had money, I told myself. So I told my wife so she'd be aware that a car was following us. She got scared. I accelerated the car on the highway as fast as I could, and the other car was tailgating me. When we reached the toll booth, I pulled over to call for help, but the other car drove right by.
Then another time, I had to travel to my hometown again. I hadn't told any of my family so as not to get scared. Maybe it was just that day. A simple coincidence. However, on my way home, I notice two different cars chasing me again. I start circling the city to throw them off, but they're still following me, until I stop at the Civil Guard station, and they drive off.
The Venezuelan philosophy is "you have to keep going no matter what." And that's true for me too, so I decided to carry on as if nothing had happened. But this time I was more alert. But I was scared. Every time I went to the supermarket, I saw strange cars. Every time I tried to take my daughter to the park. Every time I had to buy water, food, whatever it was that would get me out. I'm writing this with tears in my eyes because I remember how intense the moment was.
For a moment, I thought it was some kind of mafia with a lot of money since the cars were so new.
:::::: REMOVED FOR SECURITY ::::: After those turbulent processes ended, social and commercial life in Venezuela continued.
One day, I decided to resume my daily routine. I was kidnapped by corrupt police officers. The NFT world certainly helped me have a comfortable life in the midst of the crisis, for which I will always be grateful. This space helped me grow financially and help my loved ones and some friends. All with honest, hard, and professional work. Although this is true, I always kept this fact a secret for my safety and that of my family, since 10k can be a lot of money in my circle, and that's noticeable to both good and bad people.
However, in our popular culture, it seems that the only way to prosper is through drug dealing or illicit business. And this is what these police officers were accusing me of without evidence (of course, it wasn't what they were looking for, but they needed an argument). So I obviously denied all of this. I told them that I had grown financially thanks to my profession as a designer and artist, and that it was through the NTFs (something they already knew, which is why they kidnapped me). Although they never found any evidence of anything, they decided to work with fear and psychology, threatening me that if I didn't give a certain amount (I won't name it) of money in dollars, they would put me in jail. I managed to hear one of them say, "Let's plant it," which means to plant some kind of substance or object that would accuse you of a crime. Why would people go to these levels of harming someone's life to get money? I began to pray again in front of these police officers, which motivated them to beat me.
After an intense moment of threats and psychological harassment, they managed to convince me. Of course, I didn't have it, but for fear of some kind of retaliation, I decided to accept. So they made me call my brother to give them money. He acted intelligently since he helped me report the kidnapping to the Civil Guard. However, they could track my brother's cell phone number. And they noticed he was in the Civil Guard. These kidnappers noticed and began threatening me even more. I thought they were going to kill me. Inwardly, I had said goodbye to my wife, my daughter, and my mother. I asked God to take care of them. It was a very intense moment as they moved from one place to another and threatened me. I had my head down, waiting for the worst. But in the end, they decided to let me go. I didn't know what was happening. I was in the clouds; for me, it was an opportunity of a lifetime. They pushed me to get out of that old, abandoned house, but inside, I thought, "What was the point of all that work?" I said to myself as I got into my car. For a moment, I was going to lose everything. All I could think about was my daughter and my wife. The times I neglected them because I was immersed in the project, in my work, and it was all for nothing.
God gave me another chance. Immediately afterward, he took the opportunity to report this incident to the appropriate authorities, effectively confirming that it was all a plot to stage a kidnapping. There was no way I could go to the public prosecutor's office without being arrested for (supposedly) possessing something illegal. However, several months have passed since that incident and nothing has happened yet, so I made the decision to leave the country. I didn't tell anyone where I would be, since I believe these people already know about my profile as an artist and might get their hopes up about my "prosperity" (which we know isn't the case).
To be honest, months have passed since that day, and the effects are still present. When I walk down the street, I can't help but look out for a police patrol car as a reaction. If I see a car too close, I can't help but be on alert, or even when someone stares at me too closely. I don't trust anyone, not even those who send me DMs.
All of this killed my creativity and artistic motivation. I don't want to continue creating art. The little motivation I was regaining has dried up. I just want to spend time with my family and daughter. You'll never know when your last day on this earth will be. And you'll realize that what mattered most was always by your side.
Of course, I understand my responsibilities regarding the @RareApepesNFT project, and I know I promised the Apepe Rebirth designs. But to be honest, every time I sit down in front of the canvas, I don't feel like creating anything. So I can't keep putting this off.
I spoke with Ceotim to resolve this. I'm hiring a studio to complete this artistic delivery in the best possible quality. It would help if you suggested a studio to Ceotim.
And so you, the Rare Apepes community, will get the art you want, and I will get my peace. That's what I'm looking for right now. To connect more with my surroundings, my family, and my loved ones. I know my creative side won't die. It will be present, perhaps, in another craft.
I'm incredibly grateful to every collector, buyer of my art, those who trusted me, those who supported me, and the Rare Apepes community for being loyal to this community. It's time for me to throw in the towel.
If you think it's about the money, you're wrong. We haven't been receiving payments for the project since January of last year. To increase the project's runway, I've received multiple offers via DM that you have no idea how to make money from, and I haven't responded to them.
I also want to tell you to support @ceotim, as the #RAK3022 game is literally a gem and can attract new investors and believers to the project. That was the vision I had when I thought of that game. That's why it should be published on Steam, to reach new users. It just needs marketing and financial support to achieve those results.
Finally, I say goodbye to all of you. This message will remain on my profile until it disappears on its own.
Here's someone who began his artistic career in 2017 and will end it in 2025.
Saying goodbye to all of you, best
Rare Designer.
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