David Williams retuiteado
David Williams
1K posts

David Williams
@davelaudrup
Rangers FC🇬🇧, GF 4, Boxing, Indie music.
Bristol/Belfast Se unió Mayıs 2011
637 Siguiendo289 Seguidores
David Williams retuiteado

Rangers giveaway!Modelturnstiles.com is giving away a handmade model turnstile of your choice. To enter simply follow me and repost this message by 30th April. @coplandsw #Rangers @Empire1872 @RangersBuy @custom_rangers @RangersFC @Vintage_Gers #Gers




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David Williams retuiteado
David Williams retuiteado

David Williams retuiteado
David Williams retuiteado

1930 Stena return sailing cancelled tomorrow night, most buses have cancelled their trip.
A few hardy souls taking the risk on the 2330 sailing, which is running as things stand.
Graeme Hanna@graeme818
Quite a few QR tickets will become available for the DU game tomorrow with ferries to/from Northern Ireland being cancelled. North Ulster Federation RSCs have cancelled their trip from Larne. Update to follow on Stena/Belfast.
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David Williams retuiteado
David Williams retuiteado

Dear Prime Minister & Home Secretary,
I hope this letter finds you well, fully caffeinated, and in possession of a calculator.
I’m writing with what I believe is a modest, fiscally responsible proposal. I understand the Government is offering up to £40,000 to certain individuals to voluntarily leave the United Kingdom. First of all — bold strategy. Nothing says “strong borders” quite like a cashback scheme.
Now, I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, a fully tax-paying, law-abiding British citizen. I know — awkward. I appreciate this may disqualify me from the premium exit package, but I’m willing to negotiate.
I would like to formally apply for £35,000 to leave.
You see, unlike some applicants, I haven’t broken any laws to get here. I didn’t arrive by dinghy. I didn’t require processing, housing, or legal appeals. I’ve actually been funding the whole operation through PAYE for years — which I believe makes me a loyal shareholder in this enterprise.
Given that you’re prepared to offer £40,000 for someone to depart voluntarily after entering illegally, I feel £35,000 for someone who’s been here legally all along represents excellent value for money. Think of it as a “Buy British, Get One Gone” discount.
For £35,000 I will:
• Leave quietly.
• Not require a press conference.
• Not demand a diversity officer to wave me off.
• Even carry my own suitcase to the airport.
I may also tweet a polite thank-you note on departure, praising the efficiency of the scheme.
Frankly, it feels like I’ve misunderstood how incentives work in modern Britain. All these years I thought obeying the law, paying taxes, and contributing to society were the winning strategy. Turns out the real pro-move is to arrive unlawfully and wait for a loyalty bonus.
Who knew?
While British families are juggling rent, energy bills, and the weekly food shop like contestants on a dystopian game show, it’s reassuring to know the Treasury has located a spare £40,000 per head for voluntary goodbyes.
May I ask — is there a points card? Ten years of National Insurance contributions and I get a free exit bonus? If so, I believe I’m overdue.
In the spirit of fairness and fiscal responsibility, I am not even asking for the full £40,000. I’m trimming £5,000 off to help balance the books. That’s the kind of responsible budgeting I was raised on.
If successful, I promise to:
• Leave via a scheduled flight (economy is fine).
• Not stage a protest on the runway.
• And refrain from re-entering on a small boat to see if I qualify twice.
All I ask is equal treatment. If departure is now a funded career pathway, I would very much like to submit my CV.
Yours in hopeful relocation,
A slightly confused taxpayer
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David Williams retuiteado

Looking to swap my Hearts (CR) for Livi away.
RT appreciated.
@RangersTickets8 @RFC_Michael_
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David Williams retuiteado
David Williams retuiteado

🚨 Danny Röhl has been named the Scottish Premiership manager of the month for January.
Hear from the Rangers head coach on @SkySportsNews NOW and watch his side head to Motherwell tomorrow, live on @SkyFootball from 7pm 📺

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