Neil Carey

Celine Dion has come out in support of farmers by removing all the consonants from her name.

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@I_amMukhtar You say that like it's a bad thing.

By this logic, Boris Johnson should never have been PM.

@Footinit @manfuego007 Made all the better with the addition of some melted butter and horseradish. Whoever came up with that idea is a genius and deserves and MBE at the very least.

@ColchesterFC @manfuego007 Haha. Oh yes! Sorry. I misunderstood. Sounds lovely.

This is where I tweet from

@Footinit @manfuego007 Homemade "cheddar cheese and chilli" bread, not homemade cheese unfortunately, I'm not yet that advanced. Bread dough made and then small cubes of cheddar cheese and sliced chilli kneaded into it before letting it rise and then cooking.

@ColchesterFC @manfuego007 Hell yes! What sort of homemade cheese? See @manfuego007? Cray cray eh?

@Footinit @manfuego007 This is absolute genius by the way. Tried horseradish with homemade cheese and chilli bread (toast) today and it's a game changer. 👍

@manfuego007 Horseradish with chicken. That’s my boy. I love it on hot, buttered toast.

How to stop the boats. Announce that for each dinghy that crosses from France we will remove fishing rights for one French fishing boat. For each year where there are no crossings we'll increase their fish quota. The French fishermen will have the problem sorted by lunchtime.

Now that we've won the Ryder Cup I can finally say that American golf fans have absolutely no redeeming qualities. And that sentence works just as well if you remove " golf fan".

@Wolves new signing Fer Lopez must surely be given the nickname "Jenni".

If Man City's new signing Tijjani Reijnders doesn't get given the nickname "Rudolph the red nose" I'm going to be very disappointed with the Man City squad.

@BecclesFC @karl7olley I should have tagged @SelfDaniel in this post. Massive thanks to both Dan and Ben for stepping up and taking on the Beccles Town Bees this season when it looked like they might fold. And also for getting the Bees playing well and with a smile on their faces. You've been brilliant

So proud of this one today, playing his last ever match for @BecclesFC youth. From his first ever game in 2016 as an U7 Bee with @karl7olley through to today as an U16 Bee he's stayed with the team throughout while others left to join other teams. Once a Bee, Always a Bee.

@karl7olley It's thanks to you that he's where he is now. Thank you so much for taking a chance on him and giving him his first opportunity. I think he's going to go to the trials for the U18 teams so fingers crossed there'll be an U18 Bees team and he can continue his journey as a Bee.

Doesn't seem like that many years ago 🥲 Great to see him still playing, hope he continues to do so 🤍🖤

I'm guessing that I should probably see the irony in the fact that of all the books we've got in the house the one the dog has chosen to chew is David Walliams' "The World's Worst Pets".

Burgers for dinner again @ringsfieldpub this evening with the added bonus of a 4 pint Hawkstone Lager takeaway as we left. Would highly recommend their Thursday burger night offer. And obviously the lager as well.

There are over 340 million people in the USA, and out of all of those people the best two candidates that they can pick for the Presidential election are Joe Biden and Donald Trump? What the fuck is wrong with the other 339,999,998 that makes them worse than these two?

Stopped for a pint @ringsfieldpub on my way home earlier. Tried a @JeremyClarkson Hawkstone lager for the first time. Think it could be my new favourite. Definitely think I need to get a keg for the summer garden parties.

The first question @Keir_Starmer should ask @RishiSunak at PMQs tomorrow should be, "The Conservatives have been in office for 14 years. Can you name one thing that is better now than it was in 2010?" Even as a previous Tory voter I can't think of a single thing.

Hi @bt_uk, is it company policy for your OpenReach engineers to reverse into parked cars and drive off without stopping or reporting it? And yes, we have two witnesses that saw it happen and a photo of the van that did it.

@AldiUK Meet Barney.....

SEND US PET PICS RN OR WE’LL DISCONTINUE TITAN BARS #NationalLoveYourPetDay