ConeMan

Bb girl

Customer: "I also want a pound of Swiss cheese, but I don't want it sliced." Me: "So you'd just like a one-pound block of cheese?" Customer: "Exactly. Can you do that?" Me: "I sure can." (I take the cheese over to the sandwich station to get a large knife, measure approximately where I think one pound would be, and cut off a block. I put it on the scale, and much to my satisfaction, the weight of the block I cut is 1.005 pounds.) Me: "Well hey, that was pretty good!" (The customer looks at the scales.) Customer: "Oh, my God! How did you do that?!" Me: "Lots of practice?" Customer: "No, no, that wouldn't do it. You must have some kind of supernatural cheese power!" Me: "Well, I was born on a dying cheese planet, and sent to Earth in a cheese rocket by my parents. Exposure to Earth's yellow sun gives me cheese powers." Customer: "Whoa. Honey, come here! You've got to see this!" (The customer's wife comes over and listens to the story.) Customer's Wife: "Holy s***. Can you do that again?" (I look over at my manager, who rolls her eyes and gives me a 'go ahead' wave. I cut another block off the Swiss cheese and weigh it. It comes up to 0.995 pounds.) Customer's Wife: "Jesus Christ!" (She grabs the arm of another passing customer.) Customer's Wife: "You've got to see this! This guy is Cheese Man!" Me: "Ma'am, please don't give away my secret identity. The cheese villains of the world would hunt me down."

@_10qi Hi filipino kababyan :D

STOP CALLING ME FILIPINO IM NOT FILIPINO CÁI ĐỊT CON MẸ

Choose wisely, Darling!~ 🩷🐐🎙️

7 años de mala suerte si no saludas al cangrejito feliz.

Would you Like Some Bread? 🍞

"Nature's tiny, fluffy fairy. ✨🧚‍♂️"

【オリジナル曲】いんびてゐしょん／柘榴シロ

Nature's beautiful process in motion. Eating today to earn its wings tomorrow. 🦋🍃

Periphoba rosacea close-up 🐰 Cre ig : jozef_adamek

Golden fur, feathered antennae, and a lifespan measured in just a few beautiful days.❤️

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD Morning frens <3

The badass caterpillar of the Citheronia moth! (Photo: vireolanius)

平成初期みたいな雰囲気好きすぎる

ペットとして飼われるハエトリグモ、想像以上に美しかった...

AHAHAHAHAHAHHA SINO NAGLAGAY NG DDSHEET SA WIKIPEDIA NI ROBIN PADILLA??!! #BINIWeekendOnASAΡΧΡ

Like a tiny, colorful dragon exploring a mossy mountain range. 🐉🌲

Pope Leo XIV has unfortunately just performed the Vatican's first 67