Gillian Pile

@dazzamfc @MrJamesMay Nope. Not in the slightest.

@GillPile @MrJamesMay Unlucky. I bet you thought he would have said he'd arrange for another to be sent.

Oh bugger @MrJamesMay

@MrJamesMay That’s really sad, James. Deepest sympathy to you and Sarah.

My mate Bouncer died yesterday. He’d lived with us for 13 years as a furry, purring, permanently migrating ornament. I didn’t know I could feel such grief for a witless bag of bones who destroyed my favourite sofa and crapped in the shower tray. Below is a picture taken on the day he selected me at the animal shelter.

@fountinsofwayne Of course not. Nor am I expecting any recompense. It’s his company and his product and if there might be a problem with a batch of corks (this bottle came from his website recently) then from a business point of view, he ought to know.

Why have they tagged him? They expecting James May himself to come round and open the fucking hing himself

@DadRich56 @MrJamesMay Actually, that’s the best response !

@MrJamesMay @GillPile A corkscrew and a nice decanter will solve this problem

@MrJamesMay Yes, that’s what we did of course. Finding a cork to replace it is more tricky though, as we only had artificial wine corks which are difficult to whittle to size.

@GillPile Corkscrew should solve it.

What’s in Project Brisbane? Why is the Post Office so desperate to keep it secret? What might it unlock? @elcshaikh share.google/jpfJ8LMKL9Tzfw…

Everything that is real was imagined first. From the Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams (and yes, I know I've used a hare in the picture but you know - artistic licence). Currently looking like it's going to be on the front of my 2027 calendar......

Here in Dorset where I live we have all of the beautiful flowers/blossom right now. Cuckoo flowers Bluebells Forget me nots Blackthorn My phone is full of pictures of them. My life never allowing enough time to get everything I'd like down on paper. But here's past goes.

@MrJamesMay @decorativeartt Do you honestly think he’s going to say ‘oh no, James May has told me off, I’d better behave myself’ or, as more likely, he’s thinking ‘James May has just put my post in front of his 3m followers, f*****g brilliant!’

@decorativeartt You can criticise Meaden’s politics without insulting her personally. Then you wouldn’t sound so churlish and embittered, or like someone who has never felt love.

Good evening, Deborah Meaden. How very revealing. You, the dried-up, multi-millionaire Dragons’ Den old hag, now lecture the British public that Ed Davey and the Lib Dems are the “Grown Ups back in the room” because you just creamed yourself over a clip of Davey attacking North Sea Oil and praising Starmer. The sheer, brain-rotted delusion of a rich, out-of-touch pensioner calling the party that can’t define what a woman is “grown-up politics” is actually fucking hilarious. One does so admire a bitter old bag who sits in her ivory tower of wealth, completely removed from the real Britain she loves to lecture, sneering at anyone who dares say the bleeding obvious: a woman is an adult human female no penis, no debate, no matter how much you and your deranged Lib Dem friends wish otherwise. Yet here you are, an actual biological woman, desperately defending the party that has turned basic biology into a “divisive” issue while cheering child mutilation, open borders and the deliberate freezing of British families. How very civilised, you pathetic, virtue-signalling fossil. The video you’re drooling over shows Davey parroting the same net-zero insanity that is bankrupting the country, while the man himself helped cover up the Post Office scandal that ruined countless lives. And you call this “grown-up”? You’re not wise, Deborah, you’re a smug, senile, out-of-touch old crone who has spent years playing the billionaire dragon on TV while your beloved Lib Dems help turn Britain into a biological and cultural lunatic asylum. The British public sees you clearly now, Deborah Meaden, a contemptible, shrivelled, brain-dead old cunt, a dried-up, irrelevant, millionaire fossil so far removed from reality that you still desperately simper and drool over the Lib Dems like a sad, decaying pensioner trying to stay relevant. Feel that deep, crushing, soul-destroying shame burning through your hollow core. Feel how utterly pathetic, ridiculous and embarrassing you look at your age still defending the party of child mutilators, groomers and open border zealots while Britain is destroyed. Wear that humiliation and failure like the expensive clothes hanging off your withered old body as the nation you claim to care about is fucked into oblivion around you. Britain First. No Surrender. 🦁🇬🇧

@MrJamesMay Why didn’t you catch it humanely and then release it somewhere?

A mouse got into our kitchen. I have murdered it. My inner Buddhist is appalled.

Philip Larkin - What will survive of us is love. In response to the world's events, all I can offer you is this. Wild flowers and knowing fox. Here's to better times. Better people. #womensart

@JeremyClarkson @JohnSmithppss @44britcedes You said that Tom Cruise spend ages talking to James and Richard about motorcycles. As did Rhod Gilbert.

@JohnSmithppss @44britcedes In Lewis’s defence, James and Richard never met the guests.

*Shell shows Lewis Hamilton a special message from Richard Hammond* Lewis: “I’ve never met him before, I don’t really know him so… *laughs* I’ve seen him on TV a couple times but… That was very strange, I was not expecting to see him of all people. Why did you choose him? I don’t know it could’ve been anyone, I don’t know but it’s nice, the message was really nice, thank you so much.” 😭😭😭😭 “But no, I grew up watching his show so it caught me by surprise… He’s a Shell ambassador …? I don’t know I just…”

@HUGEHammondFan @RichardHammond Oh, excellent! So pleased for you, Lauren. (and for Jack of course!) 😘

Instead of fear, terror and war, I offer you watercolours of Jenny Wren's. Beautiful, proud, fiesty songbirds. All painted with love. #WomensArt

@sniffpetrol However positive the build up to the launch of the reboot will be, I hope @PrimeVideo and @studiolambert have some therapists on hand for the inevitable pile-on.

As I'll explain in the new Smith and Sniff on Monday, I had a small hand in getting these three onto The Grand Tour. They're all very clever, very funny and have great car knowledge. I'm not working on TGT any more, but I'm delighted it's in safe hands. variety.com/2026/tv/news/t…

@DreyfusJames We used to have the Guinness book of records ‘most watched factual tv programme’…..IN….THE WORLD.

LINGO… yeah… not proud…

@SoVeryBritish We were staying at a hotel in Torremolinos last week. My husband announced that the scrambled eggs were the best he’d ever had in a hotel anywhere. If you knew my husband, who is rarely positive about anything, this was a staggering statement.

British man next to me at the hotel breakfast. His wife said, “how are your eggs?” He replied, “well, I wouldn’t say there’s anything particularly wrong with them.” Perhaps the most British praise ever uttered.

@ClarksonsFarm1 I think Jeremy made the classic schoolboy error of not reading the question. #Clarksonsfarm

Exciting news!! #topgear

@ClarksonsFarm1 You mean like all the other seasons have been?

🚨Breaking news - it seems Season 5 will be released in May this year!!🤩