Steve Julian

@cjdelgross They thought they heard "sleepover" during Trump's Ellipse speech.

In law enforcement, you know a suspect is lying when their story keeps changing. Look at the J6ers. Over the years, the excuses, conspiracy theories, and justifications for the Capitol riot have constantly shifted to avoid accountability. Here is the exhausting list of contradictions they’ve used to explain J6: * It was Antifa/BLM in disguise to make conservatives look bad. * It was an FBI/Fed setup orchestrating the entire crowd. * It was just a peaceful tourist visit with people walking between the ropes. * It was a necessary, patriotic revolution to save the country. * The Capitol Police waved them in, so no laws were broken. * The Capitol Police were brutal aggressors who provoked the crowd. * The election was actively being stolen, justifying the breach. * They are political prisoners who did nothing wrong. Pick a lane. You can’t be a peaceful tourist, a victim of a deep-state frame-up, and a revolutionary hero all at the same time. The shifting stories prove the guilt.

@NotHoodlum Yes, we all remember Uncle Fester in that 60's classic. But she played a lesser-known family member. Aunt Fister.

RIP: 2025–2026 Tulsi Gabbard, United States Director of National Intelligence. We hardly knew you, comrade.

@AtwinGracie2002 Most people also don't know that Bomb has a B. But I'm dropping that B on Iranian girls school, and a bunch of other non-military targets.

i'm tired of living in a timeline where our president learns 2nd-grade level things and passes it onto the masses as though it's a "fun fact"

@RonFilipkowski Don Vito A-holio.

Our government is for sale to the highest bidders at home and abroad. The US government is an active, ongoing, organized criminal enterprise. politico.com/news/2026/05/2…

@toys_retro Wait till he gets out his bat-shark repellent. My aunt was given the task of taking me to that movie, and having to endure the constant chorus of me singing the show's theme song ad nauseum.

@greendragonhq My eyesight must be going...I first read that as Tyranny, tyranny, tyranny...so I was a but confused coz I thought it was about the Epstein files and DOJ's refusal to release everything. But now...it's clownposting!

Nancy Mace’s bid to win the South Carolina governorship is crumbling so she is lashing out and rage baiting on X to grab a few headlines and feel better about her laughably bad attempt at becoming Governor. What a loser!

@WUTangKids His skin looks like foam rubber, He's turning into a muppet before our eyes.

Wtf happening there….also is he pooping? 📷by Roberto Schmidt/Getty

@PaulRudnickNY And snort coke off of toilet seats.

RFK Jr claims a flu shot damaged his vocal cords, a side effect which has never happened to anyone else. The flu shot also caused him to cheat on his wife, shoot heroin, drink heavily and make this face:

@tufpraise If that ain't a shit-eating grin!

These bastards are monsters.

@RoyHinkleyPhD @GOP They buy all their party supplies at PERVY CITY!

BREAKING: The @GOP is going retail! Now there's a place for #MAGAts, #Insurrectionists, and the "Un-Woke" to shop!!

@HQNewsNow Hmmm...how will he continue to get that "orange" honeycomb glow?

Trump has announced the closure of country’s primary bee research lab. This comes after a recent breakthrough discovery of bee venom showing promising results in curing cancer.

@RpsAgainstTrump Looks like we need to set up DOZE headed by MyPillow guy.

BREAKING: Trump fell asleep again in public. At this point, every appearance comes with a nap break.

@AdamKinzinger Ahhhh...you duzzn't has to call me Feckless. You can me Feck. Or you can call me Less. Or you can can Feckle Feckle Ass Kisser. But you duzzn't has to call me Feckless.

Oh ya?

@OJoelsen And Greenlanders gave him a homey sendoff shouting BYE-YOU, BASTARD!!!!

Did you find the hospital ship?

@Cmdr_Hadfield That's until Trump claimed the US has sovereignty over all rainbows in the Northern Hemisphere. He alone owns those pots of gold.

Good morning, from Canada. This rainbow was a spectacular double arch, uncannily bright, but what I love best was how the rainbow's end silhouetted our rippling flag. The Maple Leaf, Forever.

@cwebbonline It feels like I'm familiar with this tale as Donald "Roofman"...er make that "Ballroom" Trump carves out a secret living space inside the Whitehouse.

Donald Trump should be on the hook to restore the East Wing out of his own pocket. He tore it down based on a unilateral decision; our tax dollars should not have to pay for this shit. And I know I’m not the only one suspecting the real plan is to never leave.

@covie_93 For those folks, I hope it's a lifetime of being entitled to constipation.

If you took a shit on the floor of the US Capitol on Jan.6, you might be entitled to compensation.

@factpostnews I've heard that RFK has suggested Raccoon penis extract as a solution.

An American has tested positive for Ebola and exposed 6 others to the virus. The individual cannot be treated at the National Quarantine Unit in Nebraska because 18 of 20 beds are now occupied by Americans exposed to hantavirus.

@esjesjesj What's good for the Goose is good for the Grifter!

????

@rushicrypto Hard to explain...but Jim Jones convinced 900+ people to drink the Cool-Aid.

Just heard a Trump voter on NPR who said he gives Trump an A+ on everything. Then later said gas prices have forced him and his wife to “fast” in order to save money. Even when he’s starving them these people still find a way to tell themselves it’s going great. Fascinating.