Rachel Watson

"You routinely dream of the day you get released from the court-ordered sentence." #FamilyCourt #DomesticAbuse rachelwatsonbooks.com/blog1/life-aft…

The study says: "Abusers used the participants’ children to stay in their lives (76%), intimidate them (72%), keep track of them (72%), harass them (71%), or frighten them (69%). Many also tried to turn the children against them (62%)" The reality of co-parenting with an abuser.

@LeazPlace2B So true, a place to be avoided at all costs if possible. Sadly it is often unavoidable. Hopefully, change will come soon. #FamilyCourt

@RWatson_insight Money has extreme power in justice. This does not mean the controller/abuser speaks #truth but those that cannot afford private lawyers and only offered legal aid for certain DV or abuse, cannot even be heard. Sad but true.

Family court judges routinely order victims to pay half of the reunification/therapy/contact costs that occur due to an abuser's behaviour. Separated parents are viewed as 'in it together' - a family in need of repair. This practice is unfair, harmful & archaic. #FamilyCourt

@Foxyheadwraps By not reacting to it all but strategically responding to it, if you can and sometimes that means no response at all. Cutting the emotional connection, thinking, what does the judge want to see, where are my opportunities to show that. Some info in my blogs might help x

@RWatson_insight ❤️ I am currently going through this. I have no idea how to mentally proceed. I don’t know how to proceed with dishonesty and harassment. Legally and personally.

@Wonderwoman1710 It is so unfair, I know it feels like he gets away with everything. The way you respond to the injustice of it all is key. Below is just for interest. Hang in there x #FamilyCourt theguardian.com/society/2020/n…

@Foxyheadwraps With difficulty when court-ordered. Judges want to see parents making effort to repair relationships so kids have a meaningful relationship with both parents. Not easy when one is abusive. Engage, dont try to fight system while in the system. Go with child wishes I believe.

@RWatson_insight I need help with this one. How do you proceed with reunification therapy when the other parent is the abuser, not truthful, lies about everything in court. Constant legal harassment and litigation to make expenses astronomical. How does the innocent by-standard/parent proceed?

@Wonderwoman1710 And remember the judge ordered you to pay so he will expect you to pay it (on time originally to the therapist), and it could be a problem if you didn't, as the ex is sure to bring it up. Best to get advice from solicitor on that.

@Wonderwoman1710 2/2 What would judge expect? Kindness & reason. Thank him for paying, offer to pay it back in instalments. (He will probably refuse, and that's evidence of his unreasonable behaviour) If it comes up in the future you can show the judge your good intentions. Stay one step ahead.

@Wonderwoman1710 If you didn't have an official agreement in place with the therapist I expect the ex will get serious brownie points with the judge if you don't show intent to pay it back when you can. Consider sending an email to your ex 1/2

@ThriverPower Absolutely, they routinely get away with non-payment, unlike if it was the other way around! No accountability whatsoever. Victims should not be court-ordered to carry the burden of abuse.

I paid the whole price for a “parenting apart programme” because the other parent refused to pay anything. That should have been recognised as a 🚩🚩🚩 but it was not…..

And it’s a wrap! Finished recording with @gemmanewby our @BBC_Analysis investigation into what happens when domestic abuse & parental alienation clash in the family courts. Listen next Mon 830pm @BBCRadio4, or after from wherever you get your podcasts! bbc.co.uk/programmes/m00…

@mytingtang I have lots of blogs on my website that might help you and a book, #HowToAnnihilateANarcissist (In the family court). rachelwatsonbooks.com I hope they can help. All the best to you x

@RWatson_insight Help! x

Avoid raising action in the #FamilyCourts unless absolutely necessary. Cases can take twists & turns, unfairness & uncertainty exist, & the process can be emotionally & financially draining. Abusers want the fight, they enjoy it; it is an opportunity for them to exert control. 🙏

@mytingtang Once you learn how their mind works, their tactics, the control they hold and how they hold it, you can learn how to break free from it. You rise above provocation, you learn when the fight may not be in your best interests, you learn how to strategise & choose battles wisely. 🙏

@RWatson_insight Agreed but... What route do we take instead? Let the abuser have what they demand? It will never be enough I.e. Give them 50/50 & they'll want 100% It feels like failing my child.

@dr_makinson So true, and quite a shock when you experience it. Change can't come soon enough!

@RWatson_insight Women naively assume that in 2021 the family court is the best route to take as it will afford them protection- only to return to the 1950s and an attitude one step up from banishing women to the workhouse.

@kikimary5 @seethrujustice @Familoo Published judgments in these cases are often missing the mothers/childs side of the story. The evidenced abuse watered down, or omitted to pave the way for contact. The real evidence & facts missing. Opinions.

@seethrujustice @Familoo Published Judgments in my experience can be as far away from a truthful account as possible. They are bias and misleading. They are then on public record. In any other situation you can sue for defamation. Why is this allowed to happen?

Parental Alienation – what can we tell from published judgments? by @familoo transparencyproject.org.uk/parental-alien…

@AngieUn27401972 @Familoo @legalella Exactly, the academic research & harm report is there, we know what's happening and why. The pattern, globally is available. Robust claims system, accountability, scrutiny & transparency needed urgently. rachelwatsonbooks.com/blog1/academic…

@Familoo @legalella This is a fools errand. What matters is evidence, but as we know, the judges and experts are ignoring and/or obscuring the evidence. The experts are applying pseudoscience and falsifying reports. We need accountability.

Something I wish I’d said in the post - just think what we use we could make of a larger set of judgments! If the #familycourt published more routinely across the board we could really dig in to patterns and we could either bust myth & dogma or confirm hypotheses & reality.

@Tranzform I'm glad mothers are doing this and hope more mothers will do the same. It might be the quickest way to end the scam, flush them out! Not if judges protect the fraudsters though. Always a hurdle. 🙈

@RWatson_insight Disgraceful but not surprising!

"The mother had done some research about the qualifications of X after (the) appointment by the court and had discovered that (X) was not regulated by either the Health and Care Professions Council (HCPC) or the British Psychology Society (BSP)." #FamilyCourt

@Survivingtoday1 Yes, it's not the first time I see a family court 'expert' use their reputation as a defence in court. They know the court will protect them. Transparency & accountability is a must to restore confidence in the system. #ParentalAlienation #Scam

@RWatson_insight ABSOLUTELY APPALLING. THIS ‘EXPERT’ WILL NO DOUBT CONTINUE IN COURTS. AND HOW MANY INNOCENT VICTIMS HAVE BEEN HARMED ALREADY?

@Survivingtoday1 Well done to mum! It's so important to know parents have some input on the suggested expert. Shame the courts still allow the crooks to evade accountability. rachelwatsonbooks.com/blog1/notoriou…

@RWatson_insight yourlocalguardian.co.uk/news/19655656.…