William F R Evans

Another Tuesday in Bradford. Milad Panjshiri, 22, an Afghan asylum seeker, walks into a Morrisons with a six-inch knife. He taps it against his leg. Waves it at a female worker. Knocks over the wine shelves and starts stabbing tinned goods. Staff pull the fire alarm and evacuate weeping customers. His grievance, apparently, is with King Charles. Police arrive. Panjshiri is arrested. In court his lawyer pleads mental health, and notes that no member of the public was actually attacked, only the cans. The judge calls it "a very troubling offence." Panjshiri declines to attend his own sentencing. He gets 18 months and will be out in nine. This is the settlement Britain has arrived at. A man the country did not invite brandishes a blade in a Yorkshire supermarket, screams about the King, and walks out with a sentence shorter than a car lease. Staff go back to work. Customers go home and explain to their kids why mum was crying. Panjshiri understood the arrangement best of all, which is why he could not be bothered to show up to court.

“I’ve barely seen you all day, what have you been up to?” “Dog and duck” “FFS! You’ve been in the pub all day?” “No, I’ve been watching this clip of a dog playing with a duck on repeat”

Hi @GWRHelp, what compensation are you offering to passengers who’ve paid £90 to travel on the massively over-booked, standing room only 19:04 train from Paddington to Plymouth? How can you force people to stand for hours when tickets cost so much? Disgusting!

What an awesome week at Aronimink @PGAChampionship. Although it didn’t go exactly how I wanted, it sure was nice to post a number early yesterday to give myself a chance. Hats off to Aaron Rai with some insanely clutch shots down the stretch. I was so impressed with the course - how it managed to test both our discipline and precision all week. It begged us to challenge pins and play aggressively, and we found out early we’d be punished if we didn’t execute. Which in my opinion, are just as major championships should be

If you are judging Aaron Rai for his iron covers, you may be an a**hole. His dad worked hard to buy Aaron nice clubs and would put iron covers on to keep them pristine. Aaron continues it to show gratitude. We should all be Aaron Rai fans.

Castell Harlech has watched over this landscape for 700+ years. Built by Edward I, it has endured rebellion, siege and shifting tides—now overlooking Royal St David’s, where the game unfolds beneath its shadow.

The person who attacked my daughter, spat on my wife, and broke the restaurant's front door was not arrested by @metpoliceuk. Why? I was arrested again for defending my family 😂 This was the SUV they came in. Please repost

Harlech is a place where the setting lingers long after the final putt.

A bittersweet moment this morning as Bob left to go home. He will be missed by everyone at Knockeen - particularly Davy and Jason - but we are delighted that he’s finished his career so happy and healthy, and he’s going to be even happier getting very fat and being very spoilt!

Great emotions from Billy Loughlane after winning the Guineas on Bow Echo. Wonderful to see such a young talent achieving and showing his excitement and pure enthusiasm so openly. Perfectly timed ride on his horse to quicken away and win emphatically. Gstaad looks to have a very exciting season ahead too. The first two look a cut above. A great start to the flat season. Brilliant for young George Boughey too.

The Early May Bank Holiday Weekend Is Here!🏌️⛳ We look forward to welcoming you to the course for a great weekend of spring golf.

YES

Little girl whose 4th birthday was ruined when balaclava-clad teens smashed her egg stall gets swish new stall from Aldi, four-year-old Maisie Willis had set up her own little stall in the family driveway in Essex selling boxes of eggs from her pet chickens for £2 each, two balaclava-wearing teens completely destroyed it on her birthday, throwing all the eggs across the road and even stealing the stand, her heartbroken mum Chelsea tracked the pair down and forced an apology but Maisie was left devastated and in tears, Aldi saw the story and kindly gifted her a brand new wooden toy shop stall from their range so she can restart her little business, Well done @AldiUK 👏👏

Bob taking his first day of retirement pretty seriously…just the kindest, sweetest horse you’d ever meet❤️

BMW driver stealing a shopping cart like she’s fresh out the entitlement hood, and the cart bitch slapped back by smashing her own rear window 😂

Dine-dashers who ran up a £540 bill at a steakhouse and then legged it without paying are being hunted by police. A group of people enjoyed a slap-up meal at Miller & Carter in Kettering on April 6 between 5pm and 7.10pm before calmly walking out leaving the £539.70 tab unpaid. Northamptonshire Police have now released CCTV images of the suspects and are appealing for anyone who recognises them to come forward. It’s the second time in weeks the same branch has been hit by dine-and-dashers. Anyone with information should call police on 101 quoting incident number 26000213409.

Bob Mortimer pays tribute to @MWGoneFishing star Ted, who has passed away 💔

Our 4th hole during the heat of last year's summer. With the fairways playing as fast as they did, it offered different opportunities to play the hole due to the bowl-shaped green helping guide your ball back to the putting surface.

@BDGC_WMGL @SouthStaffsgc Hope all goes well with every match

The long dark winter is over and another West Mids season begins with the visit of @SouthStaffsgc With new faces in the team we are hoping to build on last season Lewis Trophy qualification and hopefully make it to the Roberts-Levine knockout Good luck everyone #BeauAyWe