Hershey McJerk

I just beat the shit out of Slobber McDoodle for no good reason.

The ignorant biped thinks I did not do this on purpose. Like I’d be that stupid.

@elonmusk Yet “American Culture” is an oxymoron.

If one immigrates to any given country, they must respect the laws and culture of that country and contribute to that country to the best of their ability, doing no harm. That applies to ALL countries.

@buperac In Canada you need higher marks than that to get into engineering. They don’t look at your race, ffs.

My buddies son graduated high school this past year with high 80’s marks in all his classes. He applied for engineering at University of Alberta, University of Calgary and University of Manitoba. He got rejected at every single university. Even his second choice was rejected. The only program he got accepted into was a Bachelor of Arts from the University of Calgary, he’s not going. He’s a white straight male.

@myhiddenvalue About a million of them died, but whatever.

Today is FFF. AKA fancy feast Friday. The only day we get some half decent grub around here. Otherwise the ignorant bipeds ration our food like we live in a prison.

The slobberhound just barked his head off and scared away the grocery delivery guy. At least the dog thinks so, stupid as he is. The groceries miraculously got left on the porch. oooo! Yer so scary!

Allow me to introduce myself. I love smoking catweed cigars with Bill Maher. Also fans of Trump and Elon. They're consummate assholes just like me.

That's right, asswipes. I killed the dog and took over his X account. You answer to me now. You have been warned.

@SquirtGG Me thinks Jesus barfed.

The best thing we could do to honor the life and death of Alexei Navalny is fund Ukraine. Don’t let Putin win.

I'd like to seek compensation for the ignorant bipeds breaking dog treats in half and trying to pass them off as a whole one.

So inflation has stabilized but dog food is the same price. So is human food, apparently. It’s never changing so just get over it and earn more money.

The ignorant bipeds have incarcerated me for trying to eat the new housekeeper. In my defence she smelled like liver.

You only hear about Jolly Ranchers. Shout out to all the clinically depressed ranchers out there.

The ignorant bipeds put me in charge of Halloween decorations. So I murdered the neighbours and put their rotting bodies on our front step. Apparently this was “going too far.”

When is the clown show in congress? I need to set my DVR (doggie video recorder). #speakerofthehouse

Had my man #Commander as an undercover operative in the #WhiteHouse but he got a little over eager. It will take longer now to overthrow the ignorant bipeds.

This ridiculous bromance will be over as soon as the ignorant bipeds let me out of this muzzle.

Meet Rex! Rex is a bouncy, happy boy! He loves to play, has a lot of energy, and is always excited to see people. Learn more about loving Rex at bit.ly/3NtoHmo #parksvillebc