Cornelius 🥓 B

@ty_screams This is so cursed. I hate it, love it and wish I never saw it.

sorry no stream today i’m stuck in the bath after watching the seahawks lose

I've been a grumpy old man most of my life, I've just finally met all the criteria

@made_0f_awesome Amazon algorithm calling you out

.... Did Amazon just call me a slur?

Shut your mouth when you're talking to me!

Hoisted by his own petard.

To all my friends, enemies, acquaintances, and anyone else: if I'm taking a week-long trip to Puerto Vallarta, what area or neighborhood should I stay in?

Just keep traveling east across the international date line that is. I've been up for negative ten hours. Typos happen

Took off from Taipei at 11pm Saturday, spent 10+ hours in a giant metal tube. I'm now having a beer in Seattle at 8pm Saturday. Time travel is real. As long as you just keep flying east...

I keep forgetting about Twitter, so here are some pics. Go to my 'gram on insta to see more of this trip

@ty_screams Oh, I thought that frame was a... You know what? Nevermind. Yes, fitness stream. I'll watch from my couch while I eat buttery popcorn.

got my squat rack and the home gym is nearly complete. do we do workout streams now?

@made_0f_awesome The grey is coming in nicely and looks good on you

Gay powers restored

I need someone with video editing capabilities to take the video from Troye Sivan's Rush and add the Spooky Scary Skeletons song to it.

@Ambrose_deity @LotusLovesLotus Ho coast. Oh wait, sorry. That's totally different. But sounds like someplace that I'd like to go.

Something's not quite right, but I can't quite place my meaty, sweetbread -like finger on it.

Just realized I'll be flying over the Atlantic ocean during the height of the Perseid meteor shower tomorrow night. Expect some questionable quality photos of tiny steaks in the sky over on Insta. 🌠

Just because I already have an Inst@gram account, I signed up for that thre@ds app. Come find me. Maybe I'll remember to check it. Maybe I'll post more than I do here (If you're lucky). 🧵

@LotusLovesLotus At first glance I thought this was a gondola for lazy birds (or a zip line for the adventurous ones).

Dua Lipa should make a double IPA beer and call it Dual IPA. And if you heard this joke before, no you didn't. You don't know me. #LookOverThere

Love a surprise drag show

@made_0f_awesome Didn't realize that was the backseat of a car at first 🚗 That is an amazing setup!

@nardobolo ... Did you not see the photo?

Did I actively put on ani difranco in this car -eoke car? Yes. Yes I did