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@melnickjeffrey1 Maybe too obvious but… youtu.be/JeucohIa5LQ

OK. Tell me a song that every time it comes on (preferably through headphones) it plunges you into a world where it is a very fascinating movie and you are, in fact a main character in that movie. Maybe you walk a little differently. Certainly you feel more than usual.

@hello__caitlin You don’t have to be psychic to recognize that Hollywood legend!

My aunt paid a psychic on Instagram to draw a picture of her soulmate and I’m losing my mind at what a funny grift this is

Text just received from my younger daughter: “It's a full house at the mortuary tonight. Everyone is dropping from covid, & a lot of them are young. The county morgue is really full, & we've got bodies stored in some pretty creative places. Wear a mask!”

I don’t understand how COVID is spiking again after we’ve tried everything from pretending it’s over to pretending it never happened

@ememess To REALLY live dangerously, you need a tablecloth under it that looks like this.

@CMCRET You need a corner cause you’ll be getting berried in a coughin’!

Projected problems: spoiling of food in grocery stores, restaurants, and most critically people’s homes. Looting has already happened at a local Walmart. Schools will probably be canceled tomorrow.

Local pharmacies are moving critical meds to people’s homes with generators and refrigerator space.

Many rural residents get water from wells, and the pumps are down. We will slowly lose water pressure until we lose water altogether so are using reserve water we set aside for essentials and filling up buckets of water from the pond to fill toilet reservoirs to flush them.

@ambernoelle Counterpoint: If it’s Jeff Goldblum calling, I will absolutely take the call. (“Hi, Jeff, man I loved you in Thank God It’s Friday! Say ah — I know you and Geena broke up ah quite a while ago but ah would it be too awkward if I were to ah…”)

Bank app advert or the cover of a 1980s YA novel called “The Old Lady on Blackbird Lane” ??

@charleijeanr2 It’s a beautiful sentiment actually. We can’t fix people and we can’t save them except maybe accidentally. But we can keep them from disappearing without a trace. Any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind…

@HStradamus Perfect

If it sounds like I am catastrophizing, it's because I am. We are in a catastrophe.

@Nikxiland @ADDiane Also: peanuts in Pepsi.

@ADDiane My kids are drinking milk and Pepsi right now because I was talking about Laverne and Shirley with my mom last night 😂

I feel like nobody ever watched Laverne and Shirley.

What in the White Nationalist Kyle Ribbentrop Murderer Cosplay HORSESHIT is this??

Spotify wrapped: You listened to Hounds of Love 856 times last year. Me: I— Spotify: You do know that Kate Bush isn’t going to marry you, right? Me: 🥹

Twitter must be broken because I’m not seeing any alerts from @SeaPubSchools telling me to stay home. Guess I’ll go shovel the drive and hope for the best!

@d_feldman Each Foo is made up of Snarks, each of which is a framework, a library, or a framework-library. Builds are composed of nine dots, which must be crossed using the fewest lines possible.

Cost of the class I need to take to do my job (3 permissions required): $1500. Savings to the org over 5 years for 5% improvement $100,000. Cost of the mandatory 1-hour 100-person all-hands that could have been a video $30,000 (and I'm being generous). Savings to the org $0. 🤔