Stewart Tomkinson

Nothing like the imagination of teenage boys. They can't manage to keep their rooms clean, but they can come up with and execute this perfectly. 😂😂

What’s the deal with these idiots pretending that the shoplifting epidemic is anything other than organised criminal activity? There’s no one sitting around thinking ‘god I’m so hungry and desperate I must have a ribeye steak’.

@1ajekins your a buoy

I don’t think Nigel Farage is ever going to become Prime Minister if he’s so toxic that football clubs have to issue apologies for meeting him that sound as if they’ve been hosting Jimmy Savile in a children’s hospital.

Going to Beşiktaş and coming back still perfectly bald is a kind of heroism

😭😫😫😭 fugggggin elll 🔥

One of the best comment sections on a Tiktok that I've seen in ages.

Nico O’Reilly more cup final goals than Thierry Henry

Max Dowman to become the youngest ever Carabao Cup loser.

Twice.

One done✅️ 3 to go⏳️

Ffs 😫

@TSR98_ 😫😂😭😭😂

At a pub quiz in Glasgow, the final question to win £1000 pounds is, "Take That's first Album had a four word title. The first two words were, 'Take That', what were the second two?" After a lengthy silence a wee Glesga man stands up & says, "Was it, ya bastard?"

When I look at my kids, I have 2 thoughts: 1) I have never loved anything as much as I love them. 2) I have never looked forward to 8:30PM so much in my entire life.

MOT today. £39 to prove my car is roadworthy. £270 for two new tyres. Old ones have plenty of tread but have developed cracks through being constantly battered by potholes. Road Tax due 1st April £195. Diesel now £1.53. Roads not fit for purpose. Where is OUR money going??

Fuck me people get famous for the most simplest of things nowadays!! 😬

The time a young fan named Jakes travelled 650 miles on a bus, from Bilbao for Osasuna’s game away at Chiclana, all for the game to be postponed… 😩 Osasuna found out about Jakes’ trip and offered him a trip home with the first team. Love that. 👏❤️

If you shuffle a deck of cards properly, the exact order you get has almost certainly never existed before in human history and never will again. The number of possible arrangements of 52 cards is 52 factorial, which works out to a number so large that it has 68 digits. To put it in perspective: even if every person who ever lived shuffled a deck once per second since the beginning of the universe, you would still barely scratch the surface of all possible arrangements. So every time you shuffle a deck, you are most likely holding a sequence that is completely unique in the history of the universe.

It’s weird how rarely you hear what it actually feels like to be a Dad. This answer to ‘who are you jealous of?’ from Bob Odenkirk had me blaming dust & onions.