Ahmed/The Ears/IG: BigBizTheGod 🇸🇴@big_business_
J Cole gives very detailed breakdown on the day to what lead to his apology to Kendrick Lamar at Dreamville Festival:
"It hit me an hour before Okay, but before that I was stressing the fuck out for for uh, but in the moment that the idea came to me like via god It's like oh man, I lifted and I got light and I got excited. I got so excited because
You know, to tell you that two or three days before that, it was like, oh, nah, this is terrible because I felt like I misrepresented myself. You know what I mean? It's like all of a sudden I'm giving life to division and to negative storylines or negative perceptions on somebody that I fuck with and got love for. You know what I mean? Somebody that I like care about. And it's like, oh, shit. In my mind, of course, I mean, I could take you back to, we know why that happened in the first place, but just to answer your question.
That shit had me feeling terrible because I'm like, oh my God, like this shit is nasty. This shit don't feel right. And of course, leading up to it, it made sense. When I was doing it, it made sense. I had, I had a, actually I can't really say it made sense, but in a moment where I wasn't clear, like we were just talking about, I chose to do something that didn't align. It's like putting on the fucking outfit, the Versace sweater or whatever. In a moment where I wasn't clear, I chose to
Go this way for reasons that I could tell you about but all you need to know right now is like yeah I was I felt miserable about it like literally like my
my whole demeanor, my whole shit, my wife could tell. And so I'm like, oh my God, I gotta go on the stage and like come out here and pretend almost. Like people think that I'm representing that. Might Delete Later had just dropped. It's the biggest news, not saying Mike Delete Later is, but just the drama of all of this is the biggest news happening. And I'm coming out as a representative of what the fuck they just heard. It's like, ah, nah. So an hour before it was like,
Aha, like yo in a in a in a very loud Manner, you know in a very public forum on your album. You said some shit you didn't believe in now you got an opportunity to go into a Bigger form, you know me a bigger stage is being live streamed live stream and say something that you believe in and in that moment I'm like, thank you. God like told my wife. She's the only one I told I ain't telling the way else I like yo this one might go do she start crying cuz she know
She know how I feel about him. You know, I mean like she knows and she saw how it was weighing on me The two three days before that she could see in my whole energy and she would even ask me and i'm just like I got a lot going on right now like so so when I go and do it I felt even better and I felt knowing I was gonna do I felt like
If you'd have seen me that night, man, mind you, the demeanor of everybody around me. I was just going to say. Like, damn, nigga. Like, my man Barry from since the 80s, you know, he Earth Gang, signed Earth Gang. He'll always keep it real with you. 100%. That's my nigga. But he just sitting there like, you're a good dude, man.
But he's almost disgusted about it. Like, he's almost like, he's almost heard about it. And if you would have saw me, I'm just like, bro, like, I feel amazing because I, because now the world knows how I really actually feel."
