엘

너는 나의 전부야 🥹 내 인생에 너가 있어서 정말 행복해 💜🪽 #최현석 #CHOIHYUNSUK

RUDE! 나레이션 그 파트 하루토 ver.

이번 컴백 어떻게 생각하냐는 질문에 엄청 골똘히 생각하더니 “잘돼야한다”

하루토 68kg인데(예전피셜) 오늘 인바디재고 9kg가 더 빠졌대 시발 너 59kg 됐다고?

하루토 너무 너무 착순이야 ㅠ~ㅠ 자기 생일이 4월이니까 4월 넘어갈 때 같이 밤새면서 라이브 하고 싶어서 3월 31일을 하루토 데이로 정했는데 아침에 스케줄이 생겨서 시간 되는 지금 켰다구

ruto~~~ 😙

choi yeonjun 🥺🥺🥺

Oh that’s why he mentioned it during the live from March 3rd😕 🦊 From after No Labels Part 1 ended, through awards season up until now… it honestly has been pretty hard. I’ve kind of been struggling the whole time 🦊 How should I say this… I had burnout come and go a few times and these days I’ve had a lot of worries and a lot on my mind but my thoughts wouldn’t organize themselves, that’s why I’ve been talking with a lot of people and listening to them and while doing that, I’ve been sorting out my thoughts little by little. I’ve also been facing parts of myself that I used to avoid or couldn’t look at 🦊 While doing that, I feel like these days I’m recovering little by little in a healthier and cooler way and since I know that this kind of pain can also be meaningful, in a way it feels like a positive kind of pain so I think it’s okay 🦊 If I get the chance, I’d like to talk about it in more detail someday 🦊 Anyway, those are the thoughts I’ve had

👩🏻 aren't there fans who notice these things like ghosts? 🐰 i think a lot of fans probably already knew, and they probably even knew when we were fighting 🐰 there were times when we weren't interacting, even if we tried not to make it obvious 👩🏻 then did you do things like when you were filming content together, you two wouldn't make eye contact, or your answers to each other were short? 🐰 when i decided to try giving yeonjun hyung some time, that period ended up getting really long. as it dragged on, just looking into each other's eyes felt awkward. it got to a point where even just saying "oh, hyung, you're here?" to greet him when he walked in became so hard 🐰 back then, while filming together, if they said "please put your hand on yeonjun’s shoulder" i felt like i was going crazy. 🐰 i was like "now is not the time for me to be putting my hand on this hyung" of course i’d do as i was told, but there were times when you could clearly feel the uncomfortable interaction 🐰 the reason i wanted to talk about this for the first time after coming here is because this kind of thing happened quite a lot between us. we thought it might happen again, so we purposefully hid it. but after hearing yeonjun hyung's honest thoughts while we were drinking that time, i feel like now we can go through anything

👤 after hearing all this, i feel like i do understand why soobin cried 🐰 exactly, it was a touching day 🦊 i used to be someone that had to work out things immediately too but from some point, i became an avoidant person and i think it was especially more towards my members 🦊 i pensively thought a lot about why that was the case like “what in the world is actually my problem?” 🦊 the expectations the company had from me and something people had always said to me since i was a trainee is “you need to be good” or “you need to do well” and hearing things like this…i’m someone who always wanted to be perfect, even in the way i presented myself…to be honest, the members can conflict with each other and talking about it is a very natural thing to do but i felt like i had to hide all this and since i’m older, i didn’t want to act like i was upset either so i just pretended like everything was okay…and doing this, i think i ended up hiding all my emotions at some point and avoiding all the members like “let me endure this and lead the way” so i think that as i constantly kept letting these things add, (my emotions) just exploded as i was doing my solo work

now i understand why i always feel that hyunsuk and yeonjun are similar with each other in so many ways omg my ult babies i love u both so much 😭😭

soobin saying that yeonjun is the softest, most sensitive, and most girly one makes me cry

no but knowing that all the hates get to yeonjun hurts me so bad, i remember it all too well, he doesn't deserve to go through it at all

can we get hoonsuk to go to salon drip and talk about everything like yeonbin did, please?

wait i'm crying... so the reason of their 'break up' is yeonjun was having a hard time and he's trying to get through it by himself, my baby :(

When they went on a date and soobin posted the picture he said yeonjun asked him to post it since soobin always uploads pictures when he hangs out with the members yeonjun got jealous 😭😭

👤 was that the first time just the two of you drank together? 🐰 it wasn’t the first time but… 🦊 i think it was after a really long time 🐰 yeah, we always drink together when we fight and make up…and that’s not something that’s happened just once or twice! 🐰 i’m someone that needs to resolve things as soon as they happen and yeonjun hyung is someone you need to give some time to so that’s a reason we had a hard time with each other…every time after something happened, i would try to avoid yeonjun hyung being like “let me give yeonjun hyung some time like he wants!” but he needs too much time 🦊😅😅😅 🐰 even when i gave him half a year’s time, he was still not ready…he was still not ready to have a conversation 🐰 so something i always said was “hyung, if something like this happens, i hope you learn a way to come approach me first too…since i’m the one always coming to you first, i can’t help but feel upset” and then for the first time in the 10 years we’ve known each other, yeonjun hyung requested to have the conversation first 🐰 as soon as he contacted me, i was like “did i do something wrong..?” 🐰for those two days, i was really… 👤 were you anxious? 🐰 yeah, before bed i’d keep digging into the past and think things like “did i talk about yeonjun hyung behind his back somewhere..?” 🦊 you thought about all that? 😅 🐰 i was really worried…but it was for him to spill his feelings to me openly so i felt great

YEONJUN AS THE DAD AND SOOBIN AS THE MOM OF THE GROUP 😭🤍 👤: (talking about the special 7th year anniv video) 🐰: ah during our trainee period mc there was even the time you went for their graduation ceremonies 🐰: since i was the only one who dropped out in the team, i had free time during the day so i ran around a lot 👤: so that's why you went? 🐰: i went for yeonjun hyung's for kai's 👤: you're like the team's mom! 🐰: yes the members say i'm the mom and he's the dad a lot

🐰 yeonjun hyung said it himself but he was someone who really tried to not talk about himself…he never wanted to burden other people and always wanted to resolve things alone but he makes those things really obvious 🦊 (joking) he’s the worst 🤣 🐰 you can just look at him and tell that he’s having the hardest time ever but if i ask him “hyung, are you okay?”, he’ll be like “i’m okay, i’m okay” so that really…upset me back then. if i approached him to have a conversation, he’d just try to hide everything as much as he could. it kinda felt like…he was building a wall around him. 🐰 when we drank together that day, he spilled all his inner feelings in a very honest way to me, for the first time in years. 🐰 so i cried that day 🦊 he did 👤 while you guys were talking? 🦊🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ 👤 why? what made you cry? 🐰 i was just listening to him and the tears suddenly started pouring 🦊 i saw him cry after a really long time 🐰 it’s because…it’s someone i have a lot of affection and care for and…yeonjun hyung was going through a hard time and it felt like he was in the process of becoming a better person so i think that made me feel really nice

🦊 i finished wrapping up first my solo recently and as words from people around me started influencing me, it really stressed me out and it really started swaying my identity as a person…i was really burnt out for 3 months 🦊 i used to be someone that told people everything when i was going through a hard time like “i’m going through a tough time right now” but i don’t know when it started, but i couldn’t get myself to tell people around me anymore 👤 i wonder why? was it out of consideration for them? 🦊 that could be why…and i also felt like i needed to learn how to overcome things myself 🦊 i didn’t say anything to anyone and was going through it myself…then i thought about namjoon hyung so i went to him and asked him a lot of questions and one of the things he said to me was that he hopes i face the things that make me uncomfortable 🦊 i had conflicts with soobin and we had awkward phases but i wanted to erase all of these things one by one and i feel like there were also a lot of things that i had been misunderstanding, coming to think of it now…so i went up to soobin first and said “hey, let’s go get a drink”

연준이 자기 얘기를 잘 안하는 스타일인데 (ㅜㅜ 멤버들한테 부담 주기 싫어서..) 엄청 티가 나는 스타일이라 (아ㅜㅜ.ㅋㅋㅋㅋ) 수빈이가 다가가려 하면 뭔가 벽 세우는 기분 들어서 섭섭했대.. 아 그래서 연준이가 먼저 대화신청 해줬던 이 날 수빈이 연준이 얘기 들으면서 울었대…