Designated Dan

@youwouldknow When I was finishing uni and had gone back up for graduation, when I called in for a curry I was greeted with a “long time no see”. It had been three weeks since I was last in there…

In an absolute low point of my life, my local curry house just rang me because I’d accidentally picked the wrong rice & they were worried

@alexandrakuri Happy Birthday!!

@youwouldknow Happy Birthday!

Blue Monday has fallen on my actual birthday this year

Brooklyn, Nicola and Vicky B’s first dance

@Criminalsimpson “He’s grooming me”

Simpsons pics that go hard. I’ll start:

@Beigerevenge Keirping Up Appearances

Imagine if Keir Starmer, desperate to be liked, decided that Patricia Routledge was our Charlie Kirk and started implying he would start a holy war in her name

@our_jesse 🫶

What's the darkest joke in the entire series?

@darthlux HP must have some serious dirt on Ferrari

at this point the HP sponsorship is starting to feel like it's actually detrimental to HP lmao pissing off the entire fanbase isn't going to make people want to buy your printers!!!

What’s your favorite Homer moment?

Business baes are so back #TheApprentice

@Simpsons_tweets NOT LENNY!!

Ow! My eye!

I’ve overindulged

@RondelleHobbs The ghost of Cliffmas past

one is her dad

banter if hannah ingram-moore is visited by three ghosts tonight