Gary Permenter

The temperature in Mississippi was over 70 degrees, so it’s time for me to make my annual December offer. If no snow falls this year, for a modest fee, I will remove my shirt and lie down in your front yard. You will have the whitest Christmas ever!

The ratio of times I’ve heard someone use “reiterate” to the times I’ve heard someone use “iterate” has to be at least 100:1.

What trips up many leaders is their ego which pompously puffs up their opinions of themselves and is utterly obsessed with convincing others to share that inflated opinion.

When the student minister and intern get caught trying to sneak out some VBS snacks. twitter.com/buitengebieden…

When the student minister learns that the mission trip fundraiser brought in more than double the expected amount of donations. twitter.com/ATLHawks/statu…

@randytollesonjr Kip Stawbridge has a story. In fact, I think that’s why they ended up at Mt. Vernon.

@GaryPermenter Probably on purpose. Weighed the results & made a decision. #forthekingdom 🤣 #peacebestill #mcproblemsolved

When an angry mom confronts the student minister because he accidentally left her son at McDonald’s on the way to camp.

What is a sports moment you wish you had seen in person? Here’s one of mine. Happy 75th birthday, Nolan Ryan!

When the student minister looks at his year-end budget figures and realizes he had lots of money left to use.

When the student minister takes to social media to share his frustrations about his pastor, deacons, etc. twitter.com/AdamYeary4/sta…

When the student minister tells the youth group they can stay up as late as they want at DiscipleNow.

Fall has arrived. I’m considering marketing a line of Uggs boots with pumpkin spice Odor Eaters inside. Would women buy enough to fund my retirement?

When the student minister learns that a rich deacon is interested in making a big donation to the student ministry. twitter.com/buitengebieden…

When the student minister is in charge of the solemn speech honoring the longtime faithful deacon on his 100th birthday. twitter.com/builtcftough/s…

First 7 jobs: 1. Lawn-mowing entrepreneur 2. Newspaper delivery boy 3. City park grounds crew 4. Ice factory bagger 5. Radio disc jockey 6. Student ministry intern/minister 7. Itinerant speaker

When the student minister charges into the finance meeting to complain about his budget.

“All the good works that adorn the Christian character are the result of God’s grace and not the cause of it.” - Charles Spurgeon

“Christ first gives His servants grace to serve Him and then rewards them as if they had served Him in their own strength, though their service is His work in them rather than their work for Him.” - Charles Spurgeon

When energetic camp kids at 2 a.m. hear the weary student minister order them to go to sleep.

“Ministry without character is only religious activity.” - Warren Wiersbe