Kass McClellan

I wish the DOT would hire me to go undercover to teach the Individuals that follow me too closely while driving a lesson. I would be the perfect candidate.

The most heartbreaking thing is when your child starts to pronounce works correctly.

Just me one day before my c-section watching father of the bride speeches and bawling because I have to watch Austin do this potentially five times for our girls and I don’t think I will emotionally recover from my kids growing up.

Pregnancy is so unnecessary. Can’t we just lay eggs and cover them with a blanket till they hatch??

Just my yearly tweet about flies and how they should be extinguished from existence.

Love the spring weather. Hate the flies thinking they can reappear

If you get to raise your kids around the people you grew up with. Don’t take that for granted. Seeing your kids play with the kids of people that built so many memories with you growing up is such a sweet thing ♥️

I can keep tiny humans alive but I CANNOT for the life of me - not burn a grilled cheese sandwich. frustration level is at a max.

Gas stations have to be the most dramatic work place. Every single time I go into one, there’s always a big dramatic conversations going on and the workers act like the patrons do not exist. It’s like being on a reality TV show on bravo.

With the technology available today, why on earth hasn’t someone developed a fool proof hangover cure.. these things get rougher with age.

A real life photo of my girls 😂

Sebastian said it best when he said “the human world is a mess”

Your age really shows when you realize the songs your kids are listening to on “Kidz Bop greatest hits” are the songs you used to get drunk listening to in college.

@McAlisterCRB I think this is absolutely what they need. I could use a little taste of this for some Motivation 😂

I think the motivation the girls basketball team needs this year is my high school iPod with all the Limewire downloads. They don’t know true pump up music until they walk off the bus listening to “X Gon Give It To Ya” by DMX.

@CassieBoeke I could be up for a tustle if you need backup! ✌🏻

To whoever the dipshit is that drives by our house past 10pm every night BLASTING his music in his shit box car with his bass on max that wakes my baby up… we gunna fight.

The amount of hate I have for FEDEX is out of this world. Them : “No signature required, left at front door” Also them : “we are a bunch of liars, and left your box by your mailbox on your gravel road” Hate is a strong word. But I HATE them.

Flies belong in one place and one place only. And that place is the pits of hell.

Naps should really be a scheduled part of everyone’s day. But especially if you’re a mom.