Humor Dies In Dankness

As a person of French descent and guardian of two cats, it is understandable that I nickname them "chat 1" and "chat 2". As a cryptology enthusiast, SHA-1 is not as strong as his sister SHA-2, but they can both make a messy hash of a meal.

Phishing-as-a-Threat-anti-adversorial-Service (PhaaTaaS)

A #cybersecurity editor's job is that much more fun when the typos lead to unintended levity: - Amourous FTP (Anonymous FTP) - Indica of Compromise (are you high?) - The costumer is always right - Rouge AP (access point) - Principal of Leet Privilege

TFW you need to explain that guacamole and whack-a-mole are not related.

#Nessus, what are you smoking? Is success not good enough, @TenableSecurity? (tenable.com/plugins/nessus…)

@TimelessP Wasn't that the graphic standard after CGI and VGI?

I learned #infosec in a tough neighborhood. Our CIA triad was: - Clean the attacker's clock - Indemnify the CISO - Attribution through annihilation

I learned #infosec in a tough and poor neighborhood. The head of our school was the Principal of Least Privilege.

Cripes, I either just coined the term #DeepFlake or the #AI(s) are conspiring to hide their machinations.

#TIL how to leverage #AI to RSVP and attend a meeting I don't intend on personally attending. IOW, I might have created the first #DeepFlake.

Me: Two AIs walk into a bar... AI: The degree of injury is dependent on the bar's substance (metal, wood, plastic), its height, its proximity in and to other structures (fences, cliffs, structures), and other factors.

SBD, short for: - Secure By Design - Silent But Deadly Coincidence? Discuss.

@family_jules Joke's gonna be on the woke when he requests they stop deadnaming.

Twitter boss hates Twitter users calling Twitter Twitter.

@lcamtuf #Cringe addresses this multitude of sins.

Driving to dentist and flossing in the car so they don’t know I don’t floss consistently 👀

@SwiftOnSecurity Begone! You have no PowerShell here.

Patch Tuesday will no longer be my god. I will disempower it through conscious rejection of its aims to control my life. Revision is only the admission of failure and I do not recognize weakness in my tools or myself. With this pronouncement, Microsoft no longer holds sway on me.

In a parallel world, I see myself as an innkeeper stewarding an establishment with an un/fortunate name: - First choice: Last Resort. The marketing writes itself. - If in Japan: Rapid (or) Sudden Onsen. A cross between an urgent care and a bathhouse. #Metaverse

Every time I hear of a position advertised for "Internal Engineering", I am reminded of the external engineers in this Silicon Valley episode. scholasticadministrator.typepad.com/thisweekineduc…

#Coining a #CrowdStrike-related term: #BrewScreen The feeling of requiring copious beers in response to a widespread #BSOD incident. "I feel a BrewScreen coming on."

#Coining a term: #DotRom (1) Entity that disseminates static content. Portmanteau of dot-com and read-only memory (ROM). Example: Shell org home page. (2) Any Internet-based group whose purpose is promiting intimacy (portmanteau of dot-com and romance). Example: Dating sites.