Thanatos

// I should really make a pinned, but that takes effort And mine is all gone, so have this instead

// btw, this is real. Pray for my fingie

@SimpingBaguette // It's possible to parry rockets Leon S "Too old for this shit" Kennedy has finally unlocked dad strength

@DazzlingBlades "Here I am, giving you my precious time"

24 hours ? Nah. Seven minutes, Seven minutes is all I can spare to play with you.

@DazzlingBlades "Let's just say Jäger has caused a lot of paperwork for me in the past"

@YourLast_Friend "No one. I genuinely eo not even get how it could be related to anything I just said."

I knew I shouldn't have touched to the Jäggermeister.

@SimpingBaguette // You grab his hair and he keeps walking until he's basically horizontal

@DazzlingBlades "You heard me. Who are we burying?"

@YourLast_Friend "Heh ?"

@SimpingBaguette // France can't be a real country 😂

@DazzlingBlades *slowly sips wine*

#SeductiveSunday 🌑

@DazzlingBlades "That's why I never try to 'fix' you, just help you with self control"

The mere idea of pronouncing the words "I can fix them" or even the thought of it is absolutely appalling to me. Who am I to "fix" anyone ? If you have feelings for said person or even are into a relationship with them, that means the way they already were is fine for you — +

// For the love of god, never move a metric ton of coal when your spine is already yelling at you

// I burned the ever loving shit out of my mouth, and got enough grease in my beard to summon the US Marines. It was worth it, especially for the sauce I made

I don't have kids of my own, but I do have the kids Hera got to first

// I am the Icarus of garlic bread pizza

// I'm drunk in the club and god damn this random woman I met is hot

"If you ever need to decide whether Greeks or Romans are better, just remember one thing. We have muscle mommies and twinks"

@SpringsWrath "Hot"

If she embraced being a goddess of wrath more than one of spring 🤔

@SimpingBaguette // I saw "beer spa" and thought of a beer jacuzzi. I am now disappointed, and wondering if I should seek help

@SimpingBaguette // Curves = Squish Serotonin is stored in the squish Therefore, Squish = Serotonin

@SimpingBaguette // Imagine a mod that gave him an actual shirt