Ben Stappleton

@Mrjamieohara1 @Mrjamieohara1 looks like Stephen Graham

Spurs new gaffa 😂

@racingblogger You’re actually worse than Denise Coates, biggest jinx every time 🤣🤣

You're telling me JONBON could win a race at the Cheltenham Festival?

@Tgarratt10 Let’s predict the Cheltenham Races man

Uh ohhhhhhh

🚨 Fabian Hürzeler: “There was only one team who tried to play football today”. “I will never be that kind of manager who tries to win in that way”.

@BinksOwen … remain a secret? Is that right?

This will remain a secret… Trust me, no one can know!😐

Refs continue to make it up as they go along. Bournemouth player takes a heavy touch and goes down under next to no contact. Right decision in real time, but no, let's slow it down and completely re-referee the incident. Please can we end this VAR nonsense for good.

Can confirm, there’s only 14 of them lads @Tgarratt10 @LewisBowden_ @PitchSideTweets 🍒

I hate how Trainline markets itself as the only place you can buy tickets (and people believe it), but it is such a problematic app which sells trains that dont actually exist, overcharges for some tickets and had crap customer service. DO NOT USE TRAINLINE

Someone from HR just asked if I can "quickly" transfer all their files from their old laptop to their new one. I said sure. Told them it'll take about 4 hours because of the data transfer speed and verification process. Reality? It takes 45 minutes. I run a script, it copies everything, done. But I learned a long time ago: never tell people how easy something is. Because if they know it's easy, they'll ask you to do it all the time. For everyone. Forever. So I tell them it's 4 hours. They say "oh wow, okay, whenever you have time." Then I do it in 45 minutes, but I don't tell them it's done until hour 3. They think I dropped everything to help them. They're grateful. They tell their manager I went "above and beyond." Meanwhile, I spent 2 hours watching YouTube and eating snacks. The secret to good customer service isn't speed. It's managing expectations so you always exceed them. Under-promise, over-deliver. Corporate 101. Except I'm not really over-delivering. I'm just lying about the timeline. But tomato, tomahto.

BUILD THE STATUE 💙🤍

piracy. it's a crime.

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@the_pieface WH Smith trifle?

Leyton Orient (A)

@Tgarratt10 Such a villain thing to do. @LewisBowden_

Harsh red that 🤣🤣🤣

That is sensational television yet again. I think The Traitors is so successful I keep waiting for it to go wrong but I think at this point we have to accept it's one of the best TV shows ever made.

job applications are so stupid. "what's your desired salary?" ten billion dollars next question

@joshpearson180 @joshpearson180 you require R2D2

HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE