ryan

why can’t she ever just say she loves me or is proud of me

every single seat is taken on this flight but i somehow have a whole row to myself. feeling so #ugly and #smelly

any day now…

gonna watch them in case one of them is jesus

listen to the bully album and watch videos of elephants and drink a beer and have a good one !

my cats asked me to do this as a toy for them

just went to a funeral, got some nigiri, held twin babies because they screamed for me like i knew them in a past life and it’s just a Monday. what a grand lil adventure for today. how am i supposed to go back to work tho

uber driver told me my name means heavens door and then told me all about his glory days at the casino and then asked me if we should just go for old times sake

can’t be a coincidence i saw this while listening to the anthem

swerving into random people on the freeway #TUESDAY

i prob could’ve been twice divorced by now if i exercised my free will a bit more

i hate having to censor their names tho this one is so funny

i love making predictions about people i went to HS with

in a Japanese restaurant sipping my tea, listening to country music, and watching the Olympics on my PTO. this is the american dream

my uber has no business looking so innocent but smelling so sexy

talk to me nice or ill fucking kill you maybe

spotify just told me i listened to Kanye last month for 666 minutes #doingmypart

watched inland empire last night and the only thing i didn’t really understood was why laura derns character didn’t immediately befriend the whores. they seemed so fun

everyone keeps sending me this video of this person pouring orange juice on their doorknob. to be known is to be loved