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alex
4.9K posts
alex
@chuncmoder
passoid in training
tpob (that part of brooklyn) Beigetreten Mayıs 2022
1.2K Folgt1.3K Follower
@sndwv_ oh that was me in high school / how i repped before becoming a manmoder. for me it was an attempt to ignore dysphoria and perpetually delay transitioning with completely dissociated hedonism. ended up doing a bunch of crazy shit that most reppers never even end up doing
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@chuncmoder i saw the tv glow is the middle road. i mean like, we need some wolf on wall street kinda shit.
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@aMoral_Mistake @oomfmoder it’s the voice oomf and you know that considering i malefail visually even in a hat and binder before i speak. voice is everything unless you can convince your brain to actually get anything from pitypassing
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@chuncmoder @oomfmoder Wear an actual bra for a week instead of the binder and leave the cope-cap at home, i wanna see how that combo would work with the shorter hair
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the funniest thing about this post is that it ended up being a banger for the traaa / egg_irl crowd but this shit is just entirely from over a decade of fully conscious repression half that on hrt all while becoming the worst version of myself i possibly could have become
alex@chuncmoder
was a sentence away from coming out to my friend last night while we were drunk and now my brain is just like “you should gaslight her about everything you said, deny being trans, and become emotionally unavailable forever”
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@oomfmoder i have a mental block for some reason that prevents me from using my trained voice irl so i use my cismoid natural voice and just dissociate. i’m old now too i’m reaching the end of my 20s so it just feels sm more difficult to come out. it’s all my fault
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@chuncmoder This is genuinely so sad, why are you not transitioning? I feel bad for you
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@PastaModer don’t become me oomf. no one deserves to endure this pain and lose the entirety of their youth the way i have
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@chuncmoder Genuinely cannot wait to also be a 5 year HRT manmoder, I already got the dissociation and extreme depression down!!!!
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the worst thing about puberty is that if my vocal cords weren’t mutilated by T i would 100% be passing but instead i have to manipulate my body to produce some shitty strained recreation of my real voice that’ll never pass to myself even it ends up fooling cis people
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@JKoralCEO i bet this meme goes rly hard if you’re 6 months hrt and still have hope and not 5 years hrt and still living as a man
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@espressobaddie @MicroDoseHon substance abuse. constant dissociation and depersonalization. telling yourself you can’t rope until your parents die when you start making plans. mental breakdowns to interrupt dissociation with lots of crying and “i can’t live like this” at 3am. it’s not rly living
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@MicroDoseHon that “12 years” hit me like a truck how do people live like this?
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@JKoralCEO i saw the tv glow how bout i saw the clavicles grow (and turn me into a shoulderhon)
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@chuncmoder they made a whole movie about why you shouldn’t do this
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@MicroDoseHon this will be me unless i get the will to start using my fake trained voice outside instead of my true moid voice
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@whattfismylife_ @alhpaquead @normal_guy41 i’m not a hon i’m a passoid with a moid voice that needs to voice train i recognize i visually pass atp at least to cis people
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@whattfismylife_ @alhpaquead @normal_guy41 yea doing that now. the whole point of this post was that visually looking like cis woman will cause people to still think you’re a guy presenting androgynously once you talk to them if you’re a voicehon
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@alhpaquead @normal_guy41 @whattfismylife_ oh it’s just voice not passing yet. i’m well aware i probably visually pass atp considering what that guy to me said last night but i gotta nail voice down to actually pass
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@normal_guy41 @whattfismylife_ @chuncmoder its tolerable cause she doesnt bait with selfies, but it is quite silly on her part
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@iLovePregabalin didn’t think it was good tbh but jax’s rejection of any emotional intimacy to the point of pushing away others hit very close as sm1 that did the same to a friend at 18 entirely bc i came out to them and then wanted to continue repping w/o being reminded of my transness
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@chuncmoder tried to binge, tried to be charitable, might continue, but like. the dialogue, the jokes (the everything) u can see coming from a mile away, like. Do Goyim Really
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binged this show to learn wtf you were all talking abt and i think deciding to rep around the same time gooseworx transitioned turned me into the bitter regretful person trapped in a cycle of self destruction i am today that coming out at 18 wouldn’t have created
i became jax
vamp@coffindwellers
like yeah of course having a character who’s true gender identity is kept intentionally vague to allow different readings is an awesome concept but that’s just straight up not what jax is jax represents goose’s fears about what would happen if she didn’t transition when she did
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