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If you are going to rant at cyclists. Please put some effort into it. Unique rants get extra points

@MumbrianSpinner @TouretteIn It means you love a bit of Lint and a smattering of German Industrial music…..owner of the Kitchen Dancing ™️ and sometimes flash your boobs……

@TouretteIn Jade. Tell me some bollocks about what that means, please 😂

Which stone are you drawn to? I'll make up some shit about what it means for you.

@NoCyclopathTO Ask drivers what a circle with the number 30 inside means whilst you’re at it.

“Why is this so hard?”

@PinkyTriathlete @NoCyclopathTO Especially an IQ one

@NoCyclopathTO Bet you wouldn't pass a test, either.

@MumbrianSpinner Cunts

These wankers deserve to be mounted on a spike.

@MumbrianSpinner @MichelleDewbs It didn’t happen so much…..that it unhappened things that actually did happen

I had coffee in a shopping centre earlier & a young man was going up/down on an e-bike inside, narrowly missing shoppers/pushchairs etc. He was laughing & filming himself, presumably for social media clicks. A very elderly lady stood in front of him & shouted ‘NO, get off your bike’. He just laughed & carried on cycling. Security guard just stood there, doing nothing. I wanted to push him off his bike when he next passed. Security guard told me not to, because “you will be done for assault, or worse if he injured himself”. And so, we all sat & watched him continuously ride up & down laughing, while people jumped out of his way… Reader - It was infuriating🤬

@BeauJangle21 @Rachelle_Hulme My son set a reminder on mine that tells me to go to bed at 9pm. Do you think we can turn the fucker off? Every night now……it’s time for bed…. Bastard thing

@Rachelle_Hulme She’s useless

Alexa knows nothing these days. Every question "sorry I don't know the answer to that"

@NoCyclopathTO Show us on the doll where the cyclist touched you!

Cyclists are afraid of taking a simple road test to get licensed. Because they know they would fail it horribly, exposing just how unfit they are to operate any vehicle on a public roadway. No other class of road user refuses to pass a road test. Only cyclists, Think about it.

@JulianTyer73060 @MattCas04807118 2.4/10. Not a bad effort…..you missed a few tho! No insurance? No riding single file? You didn’t offer to fuck any of us (booo) Although. We are all wankers as I’m sure you are too…..most likely in your mum’s basement into a crispy white sock Anyway Lots of Love

@MattCas04807118 All cyclists should have a number plate ,pass a test and pay road tax and abide by the Highway Code, most Lycra clad zealots are self entitled and think the road is just for them,majority are wankers

B@stard cyclist and disgusting fella felt scared to leave the house after this went viral.🤬🤬 I’d prefer the sh1t to stay in too tbh, thankfully he lost his court case when trying to be a victim.🫡

@BeauJangle21 You’re lucky…..mine was done by a chap chipping away on a slate

@rant_rate Yes they had just stopped painting with oils then

@theJeremyVine #VineArmy

The replies to this reassure me

@CatharineHoey @JeremyVineOn5 0.75/10. Never a good look when someone who is supposed to look after the interests of people, because you know, that’s your fucking job…..actually supports the criminal and not the person trying to keep roads safe! Be better

Just heard from a taxi driver how @JeremyVineOn5 cycled up to his cab at a traffic light and filmed him with his camera and then reported him to police. Taxi driver got a 6 points and a 500 pound fine. What a nasty thing to do -taxi wasn’t moving and as soon as it moved he would have stopped talking Vine should start reporting cyclists rushing through red lights if he wants to play tell tale

@BoveFromAbove He’s been spotted in Clacton?

🚨Tomorrow at 8:30 am, I will be revealing on X a truly shocking scandal about Nigel Farage. It’s appalling.

@MumbrianSpinner Jealous of who you are and what you have Fuck em

Are men ok?

@Daz67 I’d normally chip in here Daz with a low rating and a sardonic quip But it looks like you’ve been made to look enough of a tit without me making it worse.

@BeauJangle21 Probably had 50% battery life in it too!

Look what I found in my bedroom drawer yesterday and it still works, mint condition too . Might have a game of snakes later

@BeauJangle21 I had one a couple of months ago. It is not as bad as your brain thinks it is. I just had the throat spray (which taste fucking awful) and I was OK And I am the biggest baby in the world. You’ll be fine! Try not to stress 👊

I have a gastroscopy this morning, my anxiety level is as high as it can be. I am having sedation so hopefully it won’t be as bad as I imagine.

@BeauJangle21 Ooooooo. Love a Wasgij

Afternoon off

The inevitability of failing viewing figures leading to the age old practice of going after the cyclists.

@BeauJangle21 @genjohnmmurrx You had to mention prom night…..that’s still too raw for me to talk about. I miss MollieMay….

@rant_rate @genjohnmmurrx I honestly can’t believe it’s you John, how lovely that we’re all back together, do you remember Mollie May Cyrus ? I think she was year below us? Chad had a bit of a thing with her for about a year , until prom night