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Last thing EBITDA sees before it gets adjusted

This has been the best 36 hours on Twitter in the last 10 years.

Typical Day as a Hedge Fund PM 6:00 - Wake up, check what Trump tariffed overnight. Cambodia up +200%, Paraguay -3% (they said thanks). 6:05 - Brew some coffee. 6:10 - Trump tweets that the laws are rigged, since he cannot tariff Arizona. Mentally scroll the portfolio for exposure… 6:15 - Check what happened in Asia and Europe. 6:22 - Trump announces that hot dogs will join the food pyramid. Bans hot dog exports. Fortunately our book dodged that one. 6:30 - Drink some coffee, talk to wife, pray Trump will spend the morning golfing so I can do some actual work…. 6:31 - Trump announces that oil at $65 is too high. Threatens anyone who isn’t producing more oil. 6:32 - Top 5 position announces earnings, want to join the earnings call at 7am, but Trump just scheduled a press conference then, and he’s looking unpredictable. 7:02 - Trump announces that Japan can now export golf balls tariff-free, in honor of Abe letting him cheat at golf. Join the earnings call instead. 7:06 - Futures plunge 65 handles in a single tick, frantically leave the earnings call and go back to whatever Trump is still yapping about in his press conference. 7:10 - Scroll through premarket quotes. $NVDA and $PLTR are both up 5% b/c it’s a day ending in ‘Y’ but SPZ are now down 80 handles. 7:15 - Trump changed his mind and SPZ are now up 25 handles as everyone rushes to cover their short. (I re-join the earnings call) 7:30 - Some broker I’ve never heard of just downgraded a top 5 position and it’s down 15% on 300 shares traded. I’m pretty confident it will close around there too. (I crack open a beer as I skim his downgrade report, realizing that nothing productive will happen today…😩😩) 8:00 - An LP calls to remind me of some ShitCoin he recommended that’s now up 1800% since he recommended it. 8:09 - 10-yr bonds gap down 17 bps, but all I can find is a tweet from Bessent about how great Main Street is doing. 8:15 - Some sell side asshole cold-calls me to see if I want a copy of his upgrade report on the AI sector. Tells me that “it’s going to be big and you don’t want to miss it.” 8:20 - Check my email, do 10 minutes of actual work. 8:30 - Trump threatens Brazil, I realize our BZ exposure is gonna get thumped on the open. (Crack open a 2nd beer) 8:33 - Reminisce about how productive I was, since Biden wouldn’t even wake up until noon. 8:40 - Chat with my CFO for 19 mins about some new compliance form we need to file. 8:59 - Trump Tweets about how stupid Powell is. Futures are back down 30 handles. 9:04 - Join a call 4 mins late with an endowment that wants an update, but 100% will never invest. “BTW - we need you to update the DDQ as we’ve changed our format” 😡😡 9:29 - Casino is opening. Let’s see what happens. 9:32 - I’m bored. Go back to reading emails. Turns out the govt created another new form we ALSO need to fill out… 10:00 - We’re actually up 50bps. 10:03 - Now down 175bps. Trump just threatened to bomb Europe. 10:06 - Tweets he was just joking about Europe. But those guys need to get their shit together bc he might still bomb them. 10:08 - Ready for bourbon. Beer won’t cut it… 10:30 - EIA oil inventory shows yet another massive draw. Oil drops 5% anyway. 10:40 - Don Jr’s latest SPAC rallies 300% on rumors it may launch a new ShitCoin 10:45 - Friend calls to cry about how cheap all his names are. We both agree we were idiots to invest in businesses with earnings. 11:22 - Trump reminds everyone about how much Putin likes him. 11:40 - Realize I’m now too tweaked to sit in the office. Turn off the machines and go get lunch with a friend who’s also gonna bitch about how stupid markets have become. 12:05 - Hostess at restaurant pitches me some ShitCoin. Claims she’s up a few million on it 12:07 - Friend starts bitching about how stupid it is to be an investor under Trump, and how we all made money under Biden. I agree with him, but we both agree it would be even stupider under Kamala…😩😩

@sayinshallah @SmokeyTheBera @berachain

@sayinshallah @SmokeyTheBera @berachain Who's OT channel?

@HadesTard @0xKNL__ Depends on the mood. Too Big Too Fail should be on there as well.

@0xKNL__ @JSDRAM

Monitoring the situation as I type this

Best day on this app in a long time ngl.

@itszore @duckyIsaDuck

@duckyIsaDuck My score ? I think it’s 740

The lion does not concern himself with his credit card statement

Panic as Fund managers struggle to position themselves. If you are wondering why we can’t seem to dip so far, this is it. CTA recently pushed us higher and fund manager will likely be buying the dip or chase an all time high breakout. The institutional world relies on a “never be the outlier” model. The name of the game isn’t to outperform but to never underperform the peer group. As long as you are as bad as your neighbor your AUM is safe. As the market recovers and exposure is low, fund managers risk their AUM by not chasing. Also keep in mind they have to create the perception of “managing” so investors feel like they are paying for their management fee.

Not true. They affirmed Lehman's rating in March '08 and cut their outlook in June '08. Asleep at the wheel? Yes. Upgrade? No.

September 11, 2001. I remember even if our President doesn’t.

@Stoiiic LMFAO

inb4 major trade deal with Malta announced tomorrow.

Markets are never as FRAGILE as when the government claims they are antifragile.

@Fullcarry need the annotated version...

Which "Art of the Deal" chapter is this?

Monday.

seems like some of you have never seen an airdrop before

@Biscuit3_3 @deepname99 @BongBearsNFT @miberamaker333 @oogaboogaberas @HadesTard Idk who you are bro.

@deepname99 @BongBearsNFT @miberamaker333 @oogaboogaberas Is it enough that I was shitposting in Olympus OT everyday for a year and ignored the mint ? @HadesTard and @JSDRAM can confirm. Plz Jani for mi familia