Miles Cookman

Did the BBC end their sacking of Scott Mills by saying "Love you, Bye!"? ...Too soon?

I’m not one for trying to find the hidden meaning in dreams but last night I dreamed that I took a petrol lawnmower into the shower to clean it with a paintbrush. Answers on a postcard to the usual address.

My insomnia dilemma last night was one that has carried over to this morning. Opal Fruits vs. Fruitella vs. Chewits. They all have their merits but does one rise above?

Out of interest, what do all my football friends think of the Chelsea huddle malarkey? I’m of the opinion that it’s a classic sporting power move. Is the end game that teams have to take it in turns to huddle around the centre? As it turned out they lost anyway, C’est la vie 😉

I purchased smooth by mistake and I was initially furious with myself but I’m actually warming to it. I’ve always been a staunch crunchy person but I can see the appeal of smooth. Especially when it comes to spreading it.

Just before I turn in I thought I should say that as far as I’m concerned every day is international women’s day. The women in my life are so unbelievably strong, beautiful and wise that I really have no doubt that they will kick the arse of anybody with an outdated opinion.

Woke up early and made a bacon sandwich and a cup of tea. I then made the fatal mistake of turning on the news so now I’m going back to bed. I may be some time.

It’s a rare when a single person lets us down but Harry Brook can claim that. The worst and most costly drop of the tournament coupled with shit batting and lousy captaincy makes for a defining performance. The fact that we came so close despite Brooks is amazing.

All those negative twat-bags saying that the premier league is boring, it’s all set pieces and feigned injuries…I hope you watched Newcastle vs Man Utd last night and are quietly rethinking your position 😏

Poor old Australia. It’s scant consolation for the Ashes but seeing them sink like a stone at the T20WC is still vaguely gratifying. …no offence to my Australian family 😘

@tmsproducer Grant Stewart = Kent Boy! Been a stalwart of the Kent team for years and we are very proud he’s getting his chance on a big stage.

Thursday is the great tease of the week. So near and yet so far…

*PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT* Can people please stop using the acronym ATM. You might think it stands for either At The Moment or even possibly Automated Teller Machine but it can also mean something very different. Best to be on the safe side and write the words out in full.

“Surprised Eddie? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet I wouldn’t be more surprised.”

Turns out that Isak Voodoo doll I purchased from Temu actually works. Who knew?!? 😉

@GeorgeDobell1 Light batting alert

light roller alert

@TheBarmyArmy …and all we ask is that they make an effort.

England need 435 runs to win third Test in Adelaide 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 Whether you believe they can do it or not, all we ask is that you get behind the lads from the very first ball 🤞 #Ashes

Dear England Cricket Team… DO NOT GIVE YOUR BLOODY WICKET AWAY!!! Regards, the entire of Britain. ps. It’s not flippin rocket science. #Ashes2025

There are people on this planet that think Titanic is James Cameron’s best film. …Makes you think.

@CharlesDagnall Agreed! The fact that Stokes knew to do just that means that either his team mates are genuinely stupid or they aren’t being given the proper instruction.

Well it’s taken a while but it seems as though the penny may have dropped that you have to grind a bit at times in red ball cricket. Knowing that in Perth or Brisbane would have been useful but hey…