Colleen Gallagher

Today I broke out the big guns and asked my 3.5 YO if she thought Santa would approve of her behavior. Hysterics ensued. It was glorious. #winteriscoming

Tonight someone told me I have “the perfect hair for real estate,” & I’ve never felt so validated in my career. #Iammyhair

@Elllsworth Hopefully! 😬

May the force B w/ us in fight 2 #ENDALZ! Perfect photo placement 2 represent determined dementia researchers @ #AAIC17 (photo: @theipaper )

My main gauge of how crazy a person is, is how long they've gone without a haircut. Foot long split ends = AVOID. #Iammyhair

Getting ready for work with help from my ten month old treasure. #StartTODAY

@bryanbot note to self. Plz keep me posted on the single dad ratios as well. Thx!

#TBT just a week or so ago - reading the @washingtonpost with Bea. #FutureReader

@MattSwaggyP YOURE pathetic, man. #GotEm #booyah

Well, the inevitable happened. I dropped my phone on my baby. #ITWASJUSTALEG #noreallyshesfinethough #momoftheyear

I think Special K is a really good cereal and I could eat it several times per week. #cerealreviews

Is "Meh, it's only pee - it'll dry," the right attitude to have when going about ones day? #firsttimemom #blamethebaby

Amy Schumer is so hot right now :: Read Amy Schumer’s Powerful Speech About Confidence vult.re/1fBNzpc via @vulture

Today I parted my hair on the opposite side & thought, "Whoa, is this what it's like to live inside my mirror?" #deepthoughts

I was really proud that I 'tricked' my baby into taking a nap this AM, & then I realized I had outsmarted a 2 month old. #thisismylife

@NateGotBetter #wastenotwantnot

First night out w/o the babe - sitting across the bar from a first date. This couldn't be better. #mommasnightout #Tinderrific #DC

‘Free-range’ kids and our parenting police state wapo.st/1IFT9DF

I'm having a glass of wine as I pump. That's fine, right? #momoftheyear #breastfeeding

What smells like pee? The baby. Her diaper isn't wet. Then it's probably you, my friend. #blamethebaby