kris 🍄❤️

I'm old enough to give advice to my current self.

This little baby is just 2 days old and 9% illuminated.

Beautiful sunset

Tonight I’m hosting one of those murder mystery dinners but at this one every guest will be murdered immediately upon arrival so they have to spend the whole night dead then go home.

Found another ive been softblocked from, im ending it all

Within the limits of what a person can endure would be a cool band name

Let me beatbox on your vaginal jukebox

thinking of you happy & shining in the sun

if you catch me smiling at my phone, i'm the funny one not them

“Touch Grass” is the new “Go play in traffic”.

Omg look what my brother gave me for my birthday. Epic. My collection of bird pins grows and grows…

twitter is like having an evil diary that talks back to you

I love quitting, unless it’s a substance.

they need to make a praying mantis emoji

the art of noticing the magic

cool animal tracks from today

Someday your sins will see the light of day

I put sugar and cream in my coffee for the first time in nearly 4 years, and just like that I'm happy again.

Come here and I’ll show you.

no slug shaming here

“get ur head out of the flowers and face reality” me: