Cancrine Bibliophile

From L to R, top to bottom. Goldie, Ash, Smitten, Daisy, and Coco.

The way we gone throw something on the grill, have a fish fry, light fireworks, and party for a week straight!! Ima be dancing like Shawn Michaels 🤣

@prmade313raised She’s going to be on her Erika time. 😈

I bet Melania won’t shed a tear!

@prmade313raised Me af

So when Trump dies what does he think people are going to say about him 🤔

One fun feature of twitter is that if you just mention cats, people will reply with pictures of their cats. Watch: Cat.

@JamieBonkiewicz @saxworthy The meteorologists are going to be so confused when the barometric pressure acts crazy due to massive numbers of champagne bottles popping.

I better not hear A SINGLE FUCKING WORD about the tweets I’ll be posting after he goes

@whoistayvis Real cheese only across my threshold.

I have recently discovered I am the only one of my friends that still eats Kraft American cheese. I had no idea it’s something you stopped eating as an adult. I am not great at adulting as it is though.

@mcco9906 @cryeyesviolet_ Everything they know about him is through her songs. She writes the worst men best.

@cryeyesviolet_ His widows are delusional as hell they are never getting back together She’s not going back to a broke Person Doesn’t even care about her

this fanfiction jadksjsha meanwhile taylor was busy making out with travis while jobless was somewhere sneaking around to not be too close to her by accident

@prmade313raised Can you try again but aim it this time?

I’ve said a meteor could hit anytime bc y’all been wildin out here on Earth! Power of the tongue! I tweeted about this 9 times 🙈🥹

@lesbeyonsay He looks like an apprentice from Madame Tussauds made him out of wax.

he's only gotten worse and worse after fumbling sabrina carpenter 😭

@saniyafatma1278 Ronnie

When choosing a name for your orange boy cat, do it VERY WISELY because you will be yelling it at least one hundred times a day

Trump never said the former president he spoke to was still alive

@prmade313raised She did! My grandpa was a big hunter/fisherman. He brought home squirrels, rabbits, groundhogs, and of course tons of fish. They lived through the Great Depression (ages 10-23) so it greatly affected their behavior.

@TString5 Stop it lol

That groundhog needs his ass whooped

@AxleLotl94 @RachelTrue IVF is used for male issues too.

@RachelTrue We've been using IVF for years. But as soon as it helps men, suddenly it's a problem 🙄

& when a new & untraceable disorder/disease appears in future generations they’ll blame women & vaccinations

@NBCNews @hwinkler4real How he spoke to them

President Trump said Monday that he spoke to a former president about bombing Iran. • An aide for George W. Bush says that “they haven’t been in touch." • An aide to Bill Clinton says that whoever Trump was referring to was not Clinton. • An Obama aide says “no recent conversations” have taken place between Barack Obama and Trump. • A source familiar with the matter said the former president Trump was referring to was not Joe Biden. nbcnews.com/politics/donal…

@justshutupliz Plus humans have used them for centuries (maybe longer).

people will talk a lot of shit about parents who put their kids on a literal leash but every fellow leash kid i’ve met has been like “no no that was probably needed”

@justshutupliz My son walked at 8.5 months. All the leashes were too big or we would have used one. I kept him in a cart/stroller until he got old enough to understand safety expectations.

@prmade313raised Six of one, half dozen of another. As my granny would say.

@TString5 lol you can’t compare my pop tarts to no nasty candy corn

I KNOW YOU FUCKING LYING! 😒

@berrysweetmum Can we add small (2&4 lb) dogs too? Yesterday my 2.5lb chihuahua ran in front of me and luckily for her my toes caught her underneath and sent her flying across the floor instead of crushing a crayon sized leg. My 13lb cat likes to do the same but he is big enough to trip me.

@TString5 We need to fill an auditorium for a lecture. My girl will be there in the front row

If I were a cat and I didn’t want to be stepped on, I would simply not run in front of people’s feet while they are walking