Mtumba Plug Champ👑

LADIES: gather around my pipoos, today’s lesson is sponsored by Kalahari Desert University of Science & Technology (K-DUST), Faculty of Karakta Development & advance IT, with a special guest lecturer,, Magix Enga. You see this Rasta man, In his prime he was a soft life ambassador. The man revived Urbantone like a defibrillator. Money was flowing like water. He bought a clean Toyota Celica, relocated to South C, and set up a studio that was busier than a Nairobi matatu stage at 6pm. He was changing yellow-yellow damsels like WhatsApp statuses. Champagne was popping hapana machesoo. At some point, the man even gathered courage & maybe a little madness and declared he was richer than Harmonize. He Said his fleet of cars could sustain the Tanzanian artist for years. Fleet na kagari kamoja, ooliskia wapi? But as the scriptures of life say, Pride goeth before a catastrophic character development. Lifestyle ikamramba namna hatarii. The money dried up faster than safaricom bandoos. From champagne to Kanamba Special, from soft life to soft landing kwa pavements. Bhang became breakfast, lunch, and supper. Before we knew it, our boy alikuwa ameuza gari, furniture & studio equipment. He graduated to full-time street philosopher, walking around estates, collecting garbage like he’s auditioning for a recycling documentary. But luckily for him Daughter of Agrippina appeared. This lady saw this fallen general of Softlife and decided to rehabilitate him. She took him in, fed him, clothed him, even handled other important departments of human survival,, you know,, horizontal engineering na kazalikaa. In short, she did full service, NGO, Red Cross and UN combined. Out of this mercy mission, a child was born. At some point, Magix Enga even went online shedding tears of gratitude, praising this woman for rescuing him from the pits of rock bottom and borderline madness. Fast forward, Yesterday our resurrected superstar tied the knot,, but with another yellow-yellow damsel. The same man who was once being fed like a stray cat has now upgraded to a wedding buffet with a financially stable bride. And Daughter of Agrippina is Left at the entrance of Kalahari Unifastii, holding a baby and memories while eating premium dust. Let’s be honest my pipoos, without that woman, this man would probably still be roaming estates, arguing with dustbins and greeting streetlights. So ladies, this should serve as a lesson to y'all. If you decide to pick a struggling man, just know you might be running a rehabilitation center, not building a future. And when he finally makes it, you might be thanked with a motivational speech and then replaced like a worn-out tyre. So Sister Jennifer, please please please, don’t volunteer to be a before and after testimony. Dust is constant, chesaa. Na kama kawa sisi walala hoii hatuna maoni, Letu Jicho tu.👀

Adidas ??

Ombachi ?

I and four of my friends agreed to resign and start our own law firms. I'm still waiting for them to resign

Form ya leo Sato ishajipa!!💉💉 Tupatane Bar Next Door, Kiambu Road tuskize G Money, Cibin na tukamate good vibes ama namna gani?

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