don

Remember they said weed was a gateway drug hahahahah. Like if you smoke some pot you’re gonna try meth tomorrow. Old white people are so god damn stupid

Holy FUCK i hate my coworkers

They all think im a weirdo because instead of smoking or scrolling on breaks i stand perfectly still in a beam of sunlight and pretend im a flower

dudes at house parties: this song was on Tony Hawk Pro Skater

Playing a risky game of how much baylee's can i add to my coffee before my coworkers smell it. #imoldgreg

Trudeau just looooves flexing that he can speak french on everyone eh. We don't know what the fuck you're saying buddy nobody actually speaks french not even the french

american culture is telling a 17 year old to pick something they like to do and bet $100,000 and 4 years that they’ll like doing it for the rest of their entire life

@beachcvt Word

its sick that the indigenous people of the americas invented blasting cigs like 8000 years ago. they were so ahead of their time.

*youth pastor voice*: "you know who else was a big virgen looser? "

The masculine urge to ask your ex how her car is running every time you see her.

Pretty rockstar shit right here twitter.com/stevekouleas/s…

Me: (Hurriedly putting my boxers and pants back on) It's too close to the butthole Her: What? Me: I didn't realize how close it was

When i was a kid my friends and i would say the most horrible fucked up hateful shit to one another haha

Fancy restaurants be like. Make it look like shit and be impossible to eat. 👌

Edward dicksforhands

asking my cat the tough questions. "whose belly is this, is this your belly, is this the smallest belly i've ever seen," etc.

I’ll be like “I’m so stressed I’m in hell” and it’s just about an email