Ted Geneva Convention Attendee

@DidIndianaW Me on my drive home from my local Applebees

Most locked in man in history

IVE JUST GOT THREE THINGS TO SAY, GOD BLESS OUT TROOPS, GOD BLESS AMERICA, AND GENTLEMEN START YOUR ENGINES!!!

@isaiahthomas Still Would be the shortest guy on the floor

I wanted to sub in so bad today at my teams aau game 😂

@Jermiah_Smith1 Shut up and dribble

Football come and go, but the impact you leave on people last forever💯

@BarstoolGruden Massa portnoy promised scrapper that bbq back when you were a head coach #sellout

Scrapper smells the BBQ.

@donthurtemgirth Little St james island

Based on the way he wears his hat, where do you think he’s from? #251hatwearer

@richarddougla5 Sandals seen more miles than those tire #fraud

Absolute beast ripping a dart in his chair outside of Waffle House this morning #expand

@rooosterx Light yuenling making me rethink my existence #returnthat #fordfocus

Let’s have ourselves a day

@AB84 AB my wife still asked for child support after I threw a box of macaroni dicks at her what is the next course of action

The cheat code for getting what you want is being grateful for what you already have.

@HammondCheddar Catch me dead before you find one of those velo feet bags under my lips #indians

In the past 2 nights I’ve: - Worn floor fits - Woke up with all clothes and lights on - Had chud chin from drinking all day - Maxed out my credit card - Wife still hates me Velos for lunch

@billyfkinmeier Let me enlighten you to the “drive home beer” upper echelon top three beer

Train beer top 5 beer

Can’t wait to wake up and wonder who parked my truck in the driveway #wasntme

@fred_da_pred My buddy swinging with a hundo outta his left nostril #likeagent

Who has the prettiest swing of all time in mlb history? Wanna see everyone’s opinion

And would deal with consequences

Has Gina carano gone through menopause yet cuz #wood

@KevinNix5889 Taps divider while on the can, “don’t you hate these things”

Times can change real quick #sackdemic

@zippychance @stoolpresidente No need to chimp out.

@Theodorehinge @stoolpresidente The shriners?

Best chicken parm in Atlanta?