Adrian Chard

Made me smile . A friend just sent me this If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines eight years ago, you would have £49.00 today. If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in AIG insurance seven years ago, you would have £33.00 today. If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Lehman Brothers eleven years ago, you would have nothing today. If you had purchased £1,000 of shares in Northern Rock nine years ago, you would have nothing today But, if you had purchased £1,000 worth of beer one year ago at Tesco's, drunk all the beer, then taken the aluminum cans to the scrap metal dealer, you would have received £214.00. Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. A recent study found that the average person walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that we drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means that, on average, we get about 41 miles to the gallon! Makes you proud to be a piss head.🍻😂

Butter is genuinely incredible. Cook your steak in it. Cook your eggs in it until it pools around the yolks like a small golden lake. Slather it on liver. Stack a slice on top of mince so thick the pan starts to feel embarrassed. Stir a knob through the pan juices. Roast a chicken under it. Brown it gently and pour the foaming brown butter over the ribeye, crust crackling, salt optional. Use it as a condiment. Yes. As a condiment. Have a small dish of butter on the table the way some households have salt. Eat it off a knife at 11pm when nobody is watching. Eat it off a knife at 11pm when somebody is watching, and look them in the eye. Pack a small block in your luggage. Customs will have questions. The questions are not really about the butter. Use it to bribe a magistrate. Anoint a relative on their birthday. Build a small altar in the corner of the kitchen and place the salted block at the centre. Send a stick of butter to your enemy in the post. Receive theirs in return. Stalemate. Both kitchens win. Trade a wheel of it for safe passage through a checkpoint. Slip a pat under the tongue of a sleeping rival. Smear it on the doorframe to ward off the dietician. Leave a small offering by the back gate for the goat. The Celts buried it in bogs for two thousand years and dug it up still edible. The French built a cuisine around it. The Tibetans put it in their tea. The Indians clarified it and gave it a holy name. You were told to be afraid of it by a margarine company in 1977. Have a think about who benefited from that. Eat the butter.

Dean was born with epidermolysis bullosa, a rare genetic condition that causes his skin to blister and tear at the slightest touch. Despite being given just two years to live when he was born, he has defied the odds and is now 46 years old.

Maggie, The Pregnant Dog Who Was Shot 17 Times, Is Now Spreading Smiles As A Therapy Dog!

King Charles has spoken out against Starmer’s attempted Chagos giveaway with THESE words while visiting Bermuda.👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 “I hardly need to say that Bermuda, like ALL the Overseas Territories, is a most cherished and important member of the British family”

DON’T LOOK AWAY! HE IS ONLY 18. HE IS ONLY 18. Danial Niazi He was subjected to forced confession under severe torture & now, has been SENTENCED TO DEATH by the Islamic regime. Be his voice before it’s too late. @POTUS @marklevinshow @FoxNews #KingRezaPahlavi‌ForIran

So vote Reform and the waste in the Civil Service will remove themselves? Sounds good to me.

Hey @HiltonHotels, one of your guests vandalized my vehicle on your property while I’m a paying guest staying at your hotel. I have the entire incident captured on Tesla Sentry Mode footage. Your staff has been dismissive, unwilling to take meaningful action, and I’m now genuinely concerned for my safety while being out of town. Front desk staff even pretended to call management while calling another phone at the desk. Management’s response was essentially: ‘it looked like half & half creamer.’ They don’t know what substance was thrown on my vehicle, and neither do I. The bigger issue is this: if someone is comfortable vandalizing a guest’s vehicle on hotel property, what else are they capable of? @Tesla community, help me make this individual famous. Hilton corporate needs to see how this is being handled.

Gers is produced by the Scottish Government which is controlled by the SNP. When did you become a total idiot? Did it happen slowly or overnight?

Jeez you’re an even bigger twat than I thought. We will communicate no more. Go wallow in your ignorance.

We are not the ones living in danger. We are the storm awaiting those who dare attack us. The UAE does not tolerate terror. The Islamic regime in Iran will learn that lesson the hard way.

Austrian man dragged to court for loudly breaking wind near police officers, then wins his case Vienna, Austria: A man was standing at a cigarette vending machine talking on the phone when he broke wind loudly right next to two uniformed police officers. He started laughing while recounting the moment on the call, which the officers heard. He was issued two fines totalling €300 for “offending public decency” and “ridiculing a legitimate official action”. The man refused to pay, arguing the fart was involuntary, and took the case to the regional administrative court. The court ruled the act was involuntary and his laughter was protected under freedom of expression. Both fines have been overturned. Farting in public remains perfectly legal in Austria.

You believe wrongly. I took no position on Brexit. How could I — I was with the BBC at the time, doing tough interviews with Remainers and Leavers alike. I will not waste my time answering questions based on a false premise.

Labour folk don’t see the joke. They’re furious with these appointments. Not in themselves. They see them as minor, marginal, have no great objection to either. But for Starmer to do it just 48 hours after Labour’s election thumping is proof positive, as one Labour cabinet minister says, ‘he really just doesn’t get it.’

Heartbreaking photo shows 5-month-old puppy high on cocaine with saucer eyes after owner allegedly strangled her with leash Jensen Beach, Florida: Five-month-old puggle Inga was found trembling and having seizures after her 62-year-old owner John Burt Sparhawk allegedly lifted her six-and-a-half feet in the air by the leash, wrapped it around her neck and dropped her onto the pavement multiple times. Neighbours heard her screaming and choking around midnight on April 28. Vets confirmed cocaine in her system her pupils were massively dilated like a human high on the drug. The heartbreaking photo shows the terrified puppy staring wide-eyed with ears down, clearly in distress. Sparhawk has been charged with animal cruelty and released on bond with a no-contact order. Inga is now safe and recovering at the Humane Society of the Treasure Coast. What kind of bastard does this to a bloody puppy!!!

I'll keep selling non-halal food. Arrest me as many times as you can.

Well done Mr Farage,you put her back in her place 👌👌👌👌👍👍👍👍

Did you guys know there is a biker gang called rescue ink that breaks up dogfighting rings, confronts animal abusers, confiscates neglected animals and investigates stolen animals