“Attention shoppers we are looking for a.. excuse me what was the name of your brother?”
ME (giggling uncontrollably): umm My Massive-haha-sorry My Massive Co- AHA- AGH dang it. My Massive Cock And Balls And Cum And Shit ahahahahahahaha
There’s a sex position and I can’t remember what it’s called but it’s M/F and essentially you both bend over, place your butts parallel so as to form a T and you fart into each other while stimulating yourselves
Can anyone help me out with the name? Bout to go see my girlfriend
I showed up to my son’s second grade “Bring Your Dad to School” day. All the dads had to stand up and say what they do for work. Being divorced and unemployed, I started to get nervous. So I tried the ol’ trick of imagining the class naked to calm down. Next thing I know I’m getting dragged out of the classroom because I apparently zoned out and started jacking off.
Locked myself in my closet because my old sex doll gained sentience after Frosty the Snowman's hat fell onto its head in the dumpster behind Chevron and showed up at my house claiming to be pregnant. I'm not ready to be a dad!!!
Butt ass naked and unreasonably sweaty, chugging copious amounts of straight black coffee out of a comically large coffee pot while I shove my way onto the front row bleacher at my nephew’s tee ball game and yell “PLAY BALL” in a mortified parent’s ear
An arm wrestling match with your Down syndrome son sounds cute and wholesome until your wife watches his retard strength completely emasculate you, causing her to soak her panties and eventually leave you for him.
TLDR: Cucked by downy son.
I’m not a “sick freak”, “depraved individual” or “threat to society”
I’m learning and growing as a human in an ever changing world. And I can promise the jury and this ENTIRE COURT ROOM, that I will not masturbate in a theater re-release showing of Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over again
Me too! You can really see the positivity him and his family have brought to the league. Hell, even Celtics fans chant his son Nick’s full name when they play Boston. Actually, I think they shout “Nick Kerr” whether he’s there or not.