beep

Eminem at the end of Stan:

@TheAlienKnows prick

Didn’t feel like it.

@Nathdead12 @swrilswirlshine an uber isn’t even enough, call yo fucking mothership

So she has to piss in a bottle but has shaved legs and tidy hair??

Aaron Paul (Breaking Bad) has been cast in DCU’s CLAYFACE! (Via featurefirst.net/aaron-paul-joi…)

what being in your 20s feels like

I shouldnt have smoked that shit now I’m moving to the squidward ethnostate

i’m pretty sure my nana just invented obama drugs

@dsxf234161 nice try, pal

when you die in wisconsin you die in real life

she took my boxers off and my glock 40 fell out hit the ground and shot her cat

dropped my son into boiling water and he screamed loud as hell

five moids and fries

when i was 8 i saw santa claus tear my neighbor’s dog in half

i got -200 dollars in my account and 23 miles left in my car nigga i'm a ticking time bomb til payday. ill tell the manager shut the fuck up at this point

i went to a public pool and drank all the water

'BACKROOMS' director Kane Parsons has reportedly discovered an anti-aging serum. He is 19 years old.

@RobertB33227505 @1800clockit ur name is bobby and ur bald

@1800clockit Nah it’s not an issue, lip filler on the other hand is man repellant

OFFICER FUCKING MARTINEZ IS BACK FOR THE BATMAN PART 2

More... tomorrow... 🦇🦇

matt reeves i owe you my life, lemme know if u ever need yo shit twirled on fr