emi automatic

dc from zeds dead handed me a samwich from katz deli while im watching them from 2 ft away im very satisfied

romanticize the tree as much as you can

loving 2 birds with one stone

i’m reserving my sweet side for children, sexy women and animals. everybody n everything else can kiss my ass i promise u

i need one of those friends with an open door policy that i can just walk in and plop on their couch

Party ideas. Each guest is tasked with bringing the most controversial person they know as a plus one

I need you to be on your baldest behavior

fish to your head name a gun

listening to heavy metal because i'm evil

get in babe we’re shifting reality

at work straight up Lying

@TreasureLA99 she fancy you slay we match love it

specs

i’ve been trying to go home my whole life

You met me at a very strange hair length in my life

“you don’t owe anyone anything” is for, like, trauma survivors learning to care about themselves for the first time or whatever. it’s not for you when you’re an Awful Friend

delusional optimism is the only way out

y’all be actin like y’all too P to say sum hurt your feelings. bitch you hurt me and you will be dealt with

if i tell my bestie something in life disappointed me she stores it in her brain and literally makes sure she somehow tops every expectation i could ever have in a support system