lemon

can’t wait to listen to this drunken idea for a comedy bit when i’m sober. i’m sure it will be perfectly coherent

ATTENTION EVERYONE!!! he has a strawberry!

every other hamster can go home. i now have the cutest ever hamster

i’ve always made fun of dryrobe wankers but my boss lent me hers for an outdoor lesson today and my life has been changed. i was warm from shoulders to ankles

who the fuck hacked my spotify and just listened to one fontaines dc song

three pints, half a pack of cigarettes and conversation so absurdly awful the three tables around us leave. god bless the post work pub trip

anyone want an ai generated bottle of jack daniels shaped like a sausage dog? because debenhams are selling an ai generated bottle of jack daniels shaped like a sausage dog

taylor swift got engaged before me and my boyfriend Will be hearing about it for the foreseeable future

a seagull just stole my pizza slice out of my hand. this is the type of shit that only happens to clowns

sentenced to eternity in the fish dome

only took two months after moving in but sorted out my record shelf :3

i would do several illegal things to be at glasto rn

coming to the end of my first year working in a school 😭😭

@RossJWard *drops boiling hot tea over record* instructions unclear

Gotta get my mug/record player bundle.

@RossJWard it’s fine jam. the kind you would steal from a moderately nice hotel breakfast

@xplodinglemon Is it a good jam?

yeah, no, thank a teacher day was great, i’m so grateful for my tiny pot of jam and keyring. but, um, you know how you could be more thankful of us? pay me a living wage

been sat in a lot of exams lately at work, so i’ve taken to drawing Kermit the frog from memory

front row at the mumford and sons gig, hope this is my wattpad moment

i <3 my job

@AltComMemSoc can’t believe the trains are buggered just to personally inconvenience me and stop tris and i coming tomorrow >:(

Tomorrow! Join us! YES!