Adrian

POV: you’re a zoo penguin about to be put down

8 lines every flag-shagging plastic “patriot” has in their playbook 1.“I want my country back” - From what? You voted for the party that ran it for 14 years. 2.“Our grandads didn’t fight for this” - Your grandads would be ashamed that you can’t find Normandy on a map. They fought with Poles, Sikhs, Gurkhas, and West Indians beside them. They’d have more in common with the immigrants you hate than plastic patriots sharing memes about them. 3.“This isn’t the Britain I grew up in” - Correct. It has lower crime, longer life expectancy, and better healthcare than the 1970s you’re romanticising. You just don’t remember the power cuts and three-day weeks. 4.“Britain is broken” - The most unpatriotic sentence in the English language, repeated daily by people say they love their country. 5. “We’re full” - The Netherlands has twice the population density and somehow manages. The UK is not full. It’s just had 14 years of no housebuilding and you need someone darker than you to blame for it. 6.“We look after our own first” - You vote for parties that cut disability benefits, froze nurses’ pay, gave tax breaks to the rich and closed Sure Start centres. You don’t look after anyone. 7.“Stop the boats” - The Tories spent £700 million on Rwanda to deport four people. Zero boats were stopped. You cheered anyway. 8.“Starmer is a traitor” - The man prosecuted terrorists, paedophile rings, and war criminals as DPP. You import American culture war propaganda from people who openly despise our allies, trash your own country 24/7, and follow convicted fraudsters who lied about where they were born. The only ones treacherously trashing Britain’s reputation daily are you.

I completely agree with this in everyway…almost. The sponsor pulled out, it has absolutely fuck all to do with Starmer. Don’t let that get in the way of your political noncing mind 😘👍🏻

men want one thing and it's not sex, it's to watch arsenal bottle every trophy known to mankind....

@alltooriah Tell your cat the Artemis II crew said pspsps

Y’all very young, but there was a time when we used to spend money buying ringtones, and now I’ve had my phone on silent for like seven years.

Hahahaha 🤣🤣🤣

Just off the dome I’d probably say 6 eggs

The thought of some American booking a holiday to Benidorm off the back of this, then potentially seeing one pissed up Brit dressed as a nun and another dressed as a cheerleader punching fuck out of each other as soon as they land warms my heart

Judging by his “limp” - he’s been injured for about 3 seasons.

Oh look at us we are so good. Hahahaha the state of this fanbase 🤣😭

Get your engagement and we’ll take our win, just follow the script, make it easy like Chelsea 🤝

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@MrBoldOne @EmiratesFACup Enjoy your quadruple, pal.

Havertz hooked 😍😍😍

1) Aged 79, not 87 by wristband date of birth. 2) IV first to ensure access in case of emergency, best practice in elderly patients especially. 3) Left on floor, no effort taken to make comfortable or ask for help to get him to A&E via car, taxi etc? 4) No English claim, did they communicate his x-ray results by telepathy? 5) Name the NHS Trust and Ambulance Provider to allow them a right of reply.

putting an expiration date on enjoying your life to the fullest is embarrassing high key lol

“You’re absolutely right. I meant left”

For the love of God, don't skip your class!