cole parker

i’m gonna say “let’s get chemical” until it becomes a thing

happy trans day of visibility! I’m leaving this website lmao

I went to a small school where our finals were written by hand. English and theatre finals, esp. for history, requiring handwritten essays that took three hours. honestly I think it’s the way to go.

@dinkfloyd have you thought about trying “dollars to donuts”

phrase to start using: "all things being equal," pros: god tier conversation pacing cons: all things have never been equal. not even close

gonna begin calling my behavior “grandfatherless” and asking myself “would iroh approve” whenever I’m insecure

how have we forgotten the amazing power of the high collar.

cvs playing 80s Japanese Pop, I feel like I’m in phantasy star online

Just got a royalties check from SAG for an episode of General Hospital. I have never been on General Hospital. I don’t think. Huh.

@ladyharperl I was gagged at the triple entendre

@ColeReihing I’m sorry to pick favorites but this one was my favorite

my nervous system cannot tell the difference between a firing squad and a first date

weeee

@ladyharperl first dates like a firing squad, I really should have masturbated before getting here

@ladyharperl first dates like a firing squad, lucky most of us are shooting blanks -Christina

@ladyharperl first dates like a firing squad, don’t know if I’ll end up against the wall -Matt

@ladyharperl first dates like a firing squad, there’s more men than I expected, but it’s not an issue -mads

@ladyharperl a first date is like a firing squad, i know we’re close to climax when they pull out the blindfold -cole

the goals; the progress

@cumahholt I can never delete this app because every three months I’m reminded we have the same opinions on media

@ColeReihing the sincerity of this movie was so nice

everybody cut this on, idc if you watch it just turn it on. but also watch it it’s stellar

The KC Chiefs are Rocko, Elmo

Elmo can legally run in the Kentucky derby