Nate Spell

and yes, after almost a whole year of silence, it took vladimir putin to pull me out of hiding so i could tweet this missive into the void

who had "world war iii" on their 2022 bingo card? #thisisfine

Other people say hot dogs are a type of taco. So why can’t I order one at Taco Bell? #ThinkAboutIt

Some people say hot dogs are sandwiches. But if you can’t buy it at Quiznos, can you really call it a sandwich? #MakesYouThink

The other night I dreamed I was barbecuing for some of my favorite people and after 12 hours of cooking the meat was still tough. No idea what went wrong, but Abe and Darth were surprisingly chill about it.

every zoom call ever: “Any questions?” 🦗 ⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️⬛️ ⬛️⬛️😶⬛️⬛️ 😶⬛️⬛️⬛️😶 ⬛️⬛️⬛️😶⬛️

"Tell them Luca Brasi tweaks with the fishes." #FirstTweet #HiMom edition.cnn.com/2021/07/06/eur…