Quil0pth

@Sadkermit28 Thank you friend! 😁

@Quil0pth Goated lineup

Trying to get back to listening to a lot of music again, so albums I heard this week

@goatmonty sorry you feel that way, and this probably doesn't change much but I think you look really good lol

i look so bad its ruining my life. or maybe caring is ruining my life. or both

31 yrs ago today, Björk released her 2nd album 𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐭. A bold, adventurous record that saw her experimenting with a variety of styles such as art pop, industrial, jazz, electronica, and trip hop. It's one of the most influential albums of the 90s.

Humbling too, for a little bit you can really convince yourself this is it, you've found energy and hope to make changes, but then the long arduous path makes itself clear and you have to choose to walk it

Kinda funny how feelings work sometimes. Brain's just been reminding me I still have quite a long way to go to being close to any sort of a normal or "good" but oh well, working on it

@Opossummoder I tend to find myself thinking that way too, and I don't have a very strong concrete answer or anything of the sort, but we do make happiness sometimes, or find it, or have it find us unexpectedly, and I know it's hard to hope but perhaps there's is a chance, small but still.

@Quil0pth i dont believe that life has value just because. there are times where it just really isnt worth it.

the idea that people actually go out socializing multiple times a week, have people they talk to, exist in public daily, and genuinely enjoy their life is such a foreign concept to me like ive spent genuinely like 90% of my life in my room. and the other 10% is just work & school and ive never been genuinely happy ever

I just want to be happy and make others happy, to love and be loved

I know I'm always being miserable, defeatist and plain pathetic, but I do want to keep trying, to work towards bettering myself, to be a good person who brings positive change for myself and everyone I know and don't, and it looks impossible but I wanna try still

@bas1lhllwrd Followed comrade 🫡

@Quil0pth thanks comrade

@bas1lhllwrd Great name 😂

@Quil0pth leninsbussy 😅

@frogs4girls I always just feel as if there's something very inherently and deeply wrong with me that everyone else can see and I can't

i’ll be like idk man i’m 27 and i feel like i haven’t really found My People yet and my brain will start saying shit like that’s actually because you are uniquely evil and repugnant and have no people. you are unprecedented levels of wretched. bitch.

Gay guy keeps hitting on me, and I'm not interested in them, but ig atleast somone wants me

@bas1lhllwrd I'd like to read it if possible! And I hope you feel better lol

@Quil0pth omg i wrote abt smth similar to this

Part of the life my horrible decisions have led me down is just this overwhelming misery of feeling so alone and non existent, I feel like an outsider looking in, just pretending to be a real person to so desperately just try and fit in with everyone else who seems so normal

It's really hot and my ac is broke, and I worry I'm coming down with something that's giving me a fever and body aches, I think it's time to call it quits on living

Of all the (very little amount of) work I've made this one is my favourite, a real window and the beautiful, flowing and alive world that's always outside and a virtual window inside, just glimpses of the beauty beyond, both literally and psychologically

It's also why I like to paint/draw windows in my work, windows that hold a lot of significance atleast to me in them, because I'm always just looking in, always outside of the world, always just struggling to close the gap, this distance between me and everything and everyone