Ocd Journal

I’ve been having this one thought pop up about what I would wish for if i was given one wish. It’s gotten quite obsessive because im fixated on finding the perfect wish. this is completely pointless and serves no purpose to think about because i’m not getting a wish granted

I hate driving for 2 reasons: reason 1 is when behind a wheel i think almost exclusively about fatal car crashes and how a drunk person could easily end my life in an instant. the other reason is because i’m a lazy chud

should I: A. rip out hairs until I forget that I sexually harassed someone today B. Realize that it probably didn’t sound like a cat calling at all and it’s just in my head C. kill myself

and so to stop it i started whistling and normally it takes a couple tries to get it “perfect” but this time i did it on the first try. anyways as i did that ANOTHER biker rode past me and im just now realizing i probably sounded like I was cat calling her.

Im having trouble sleeping right now. I have this new compulsion where i have to whistle two times in order to stop an intrusive thought. well today i was walking down the street and a biker rode past me and i had the thought that she might die if she ran over a pebble bad

And recently i’ve been having intrusive thoughts about rape (both done to me and by me). I feel like a danger to society even though I know I don’t want to do those things but still it makes me worried about myself. 2/2

I often think about how i’m fully capable of raping someone from a physical standpoint. this isn’t to say that i ever will but it makes me scared to be intimate with people because i’m worried about the concept of “accidentally raping” someone 1/?

The coolest thing about ocd is thinking im going to magically manifest the death of a baby because of an intrusive thought about it falling off of a balcony