Will

Ironically life is harder when you try to make it easy. Exercising is hard, but be sedentary makes life harder. Uncomfortable conversations are hard, but constantly avoiding conflict is harder. Mastering your craft is hard, but not having skills is harder. Easy has a cost.

All bookstores should have this section

Enjoying watching my @BlueJays teammates compete in the @AllStarGame #ASG

My internet was down for 5 minutes so I went downstairs and spoke with my family. They seem like nice people.

420 is the day when potheads get to just kick back, relax, and do the exact same thing they do every other day of the year. #happy420

Talk to the hand because it's actually a really cute sock puppet.

How to fall down stairs Step 1 Step 6 Step 7,8,9,11

How come there's Batman shampoo but no Conditioner Gordon?

Why are iPhone chargers not called Apple Juice?

Respect your parents. They passed school without Google.

Boys will be boys. Girls will be girls. Koalas will be koalas. Just about everything will be the things they are. That's how this works.

wtf is almond milk almonds ain't even got titties

The jerk store called. Instead of texting. Typical.

I cry at the end of sandwiches.

If you trip over in public, a cool thing to do is break into a jog, leave the country, have plastic surgery and change your name.

I'm holding a charity night for people that can't reach orgasm. If you can't come let me know.

All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.

Looks like it's fuck this shit o'clock!

When CNN says they're "breaking news" they are, in a sense, right.