s.

I keep planning my suicide but never doing it

@geekingprincess friends told me they're suicidal and i stayed on call and talked them out of it, helped them through school, found them a therapist that works for them. told THEM my last attempt failed and all i got was a crying emoji in response. never talking to people again.

told my friends about my mental health issues and all i got was ”yikes” and ”Damn” this is why people kill themselves

the way people invalidate your feelings when they consider you to be a strong person is really one of the wildest thing to experience.

sometimes you just sit and realize you’ve been there for people who wouldn’t even check on you.

alternatively, it could also lead to them being sneakier about it and make them more vulnerable to grooming online. happened to me.

Every now and then i get this wave of hatred for everyone in my life and it makes me kinda sad

depressed and fat

@lockedheartchar made an attempt when i was younger and they looked through my phone. had to go through half of middle school PHONELESS with my online classes monitored. wouldn't recommend. 💔

i just realized if i attempt people will look through my phone #dontdothat

toleration will eventually lead to disgust

i wanna sleep and never wake up

my grades are great, i have a decent family. i have a couple irl friends and some online friends. i'm in a better environment better than the one i was in during my last suicide attempt. why do i still want to die?

every year i get drastically more suicidal than the last