WineMe

When you find it, you'll forget about everything else

I don’t even want to attend a party at my house let alone yours

The fucks you give should be handed out carefully. It's all about fuck management.

Geography means nothing when you find your people.

Nice try unknown number. I barely answer for people I do know.

What we really need is a bacon button.

AI getting scary. just saw a video of me at a party after i said i was going to bed

I do a little thing called what I want.

A womans sigh can speak a 1000 words

I’m not overthinking.. I’m just trying to pre solve problems before they exist.

May every shelter dog find their forever home in 2026.

My favorite hobby is “add to cart”.

Netflix has every movie except the one you want to watch.

even the Grinch has a dog, so if you don’t like dogs that says a lot about YOU ..

Lost my car chapstick so now my bag chapstick is in my car & I had to replace it with my nightstand chapstick so now everything is a fucking mess.

whoever salts the fries at McDonald's needs to come do the roads

Let’s all enjoy an anxiety inducing 3.5 hours.

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road.

My favorite unit of measurement is “as fuck”.

Dress for the job you want. *Stays in pajamas.

Hey, that's a great point.