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Tobi
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Men if you want your marriage to work:
- You must be older than your wife
- You must be more educated than your wife
- You must be richer than your wife
- You must be bigger and stronger than your wife.
- You must be more exposed than your wife
- You must be more emotionally intelligent
- You must be a good leader
Anything less than this is doomed to fail.
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You Deserve Relationships That Feel Safe‼️🔥❤️
Love isn’t supposed to make you question your worth. It shouldn’t feel like a guessing game, a performance or a tightrope walk. If you’re constantly anxious, doubting or shrinking to keep the peace, that’s not love. That’s survival.
Real love feels like an exhale. It’s steady, not chaotic. It offers reassurance, not confusion. It makes space for your voice, your needs, your fears not just your strengths. You deserve to be held, not handled. To feel safe, not scrutinized.
The right connection doesn’t demand perfection. It invites truth. It listens. It stays. Stop normalizing uncertainty.
You don’t have to earn love by enduring discomfort. Choose the kind of relationship that allows you to breathe. That is love. That is safety. That is home.
Be guided accordingly. 👏
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As someone who’s been in UK for about 3yrs, these are my reality check (most base on personal experience).
My top 15.
1. You cannot survive abroad if you’re lazy, especially if you’re alone.
2. If you don’t keep to time, you’re going to have problems, 1min late can cost you a lot.
3. You might actually stop praying for some worldly luxury if you live abroad, because they’re not so hard to get. I’m talking about owing cars and the likes.
4. Every successful people I’ve seen in UK (men and women) are people in happy marriage.
5. If you cannot ask for help, you’re likely going to suffer.
6. It’s easier to secure work that doesn’t care about academic certificates than the ones that cares about academic certificates.
7. You are better abroad as a married person than being single.
8. You will meet celebrities in random places and no one really cares about them. I think the only celebrities people really give so much relevance to in the UK are active footballers.
9. Your colleague at work are not your friends.
10. Oyinbo laughing at you is not genuine, do not mistake their shining of teeth for likeness.
11. If you meet Oyinbo girl that you desire sexual or romantic relationship with, ask for their ID, everyone in UK have at least one ID that shows their age, do not believe whatever she calls her age for you (especially if you meet them in night club or any social gathering that is open to everyone).
12. Nobody is too busy abroad not to talk to people back in home country, except they’re in prison.
13. If your naija girlfriend japa before you and there is no plan for you to go and join her soon, she’s likely going to break up with you sooner.
14. There is a community in London, that is you take pictures there and post, you can tell anyone who doesn’t know you personally that you’re in Lagos and they’ll believe you, because almost everything you’ll see in Lagos is there.
15. If you’re a professional(doctor, nurse, engineer and the likes) japa, you’ll make money abroad.
Ibrahim Kazeem, MBA.@peng_writer
What's your first reality after moving abroad?
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