Amanda Sillars 🇦🇺

When Children Are Pressured to Reject a Parent: What the Research Shows About Psychological Harm, Attachment Deactivation, and Long-Term Development linkedin.com/pulse/when-chi…

This study presents the first nationally representative investigation of the prevalence and impacts of PABs as reported by young adults in the United Kingdom. frontiersin.org/journals/publi…

For every parent, grandparent, sibling or loved one who has been pushed out but never stopped loving... this is for you. Sometimes the most powerful love is the quietest. The love that doesn’t force or chase, but stays soft, steady, and open... even in silence. You are not forgotten. Your presence still matters. And your love still reaches further than you know. ~Amanda Sillars 💜 @EMMMFoundation

The love a child has for a parent or grandparent is pure and precious. It should never be corrupted by induced fear, misplaced anger, or manipulation.

🕊️ Gentle Reflection Questions ⦿ What if there’s more than one truth to what happened? ⦿ What if someone you’ve pushed away still holds a safe space for you? ⦿ Is it possible that the version you heard left out important parts? ⦿ Have you ever remembered something differently than the way it was described to you? ⦿ What if your confusion means you’re starting to see clearly? ⦿ What if it’s okay to miss someone and still have questions? ⦿ What if someone who used to make you feel safe still thinks about you every day? ⦿ What if the person you were told to forget still loves you completely? ⦿ Can you remember a time you felt loved by them, even if it was a long time ago? ⦿ What if it’s okay to want your own answers? ⦿ What if you’re allowed to love both parents? ⦿ What if finding out the truth doesn’t mean choosing sides?

Rewriting a child’s memories of their other parent isn’t just manipulation, it’s gaslighting. Every child deserves their own truth, not someone else’s version of it. @EMMMFoundation

Coercive Alienation is Deciphering between The Truth, the Misleading Half-Truth, and the Distorted Reality.

Too often, crucial decisions impacting children are based on brief interviews that fail to capture the intricate dynamics of family relationships, especially during separation or divorce. This is why I created the @EMMMFoundation Practitioner Series. Instead of relying on superficial evaluations, this series provides a robust framework – the 6P's Model – for understanding the complex factors influencing child alignment or rejection. It challenges the status quo of rushed assessments and promotes a more thorough, ethical approach. This resource equips professionals to make informed recommendations that truly prioritise children's well-being. A companion guide focused on assessing children using the 6P model will be released soon. Download the Practitioner Series now and join the movement for better family assessments: bit.ly/EMMM6PModelAss…

@TakedownMRAs Debunked junk science? 😂Nice red herring there. Good luck with your MRI take down mission. How lovely of you to throw in a personal attack there too. 🛡️ Showing your true colours. You’ve got a lot of reading to catch up on, as well as self reflection. bit.ly/EMMMResearchLi…

@amandasillars Parental alienation is debunked junk science. Your Following list is full of the worst of the Men's Rights Movement. Your kids should be kept far away from you.

When professionals hold influence in legal or psychological circles, they can shape narratives to serve their own interests. By dismissing or discrediting parental alienation, they ensure that cases remain complex, drawn-out, and heavily litigated—creating more work (and income) for themselves and their colleagues. It also allows them to maintain control over who gets appointed as experts, which reports are considered credible, and which legal arguments gain traction. If a small group dictates the ‘accepted’ view within courts, they can create a cycle where only like-minded professionals are hired, reinforcing their position while side lining those who acknowledge alienation as a real issue.

@Emma06755796981 Yes. Direct message me and I’ll arrange a PDF.

@amandasillars This is a great visual is there a way to get it t in pdf form

When we see self-appointed educators in the family court system claiming to be experts, we create more infographics to dismantle the disinformation.

@DrGrumpy @SheraFamily They must really like their cherries 🍒 They do a whole lot of cherry picking there. I’m blocked from Shera Research, and I’ve never engaged with them. I must be doing something right. 🙌🏼

@amandasillars None more so than Adrianne Barnett of @SheraFamily as shown below

Breathing Room : The Alienated Parent’s Space for Discovering New Purpose, Sustaining Hope, & Navigating Grief with Integrity 🌷 Breathing Room: A Guided Journal for Alienated Parents Parental alienation is a profound and isolating loss, one that disrupts a parent’s sense of self, purpose, and hope. This expanded second edition of Breathing Room offers deeper insights, refined therapeutic reflections, and powerful new tools to help alienated parents process emotions, reclaim resilience, and find meaning beyond their grief. With enhanced journal prompts, free-writing exercises, and 52 weeks of letter-format journaling, this edition provides structured space to externalize emotions, track progress, and maintain a sense of connection—even from a distance. It integrates practical therapeutic approaches into guided exercises, helping parents reframe their experiences, challenge negative thought patterns, and cultivate self-compassion. More than a book, Breathing Room is a space for healing. Whether you use it as a personal refuge or as a companion in therapy, it offers validation, structure, and support for navigating the complex emotions of alienation. New in the Second Edition: ✔ 52 weeks of letter-format journaling to process grief, express emotions, and communicate with your child, yourself, or a trusted confidant ✔ Expanded journal prompts and guided diary pages to encourage deeper self-reflection and emotional awareness ✔ New letter-writing exercises that foster perspective-taking, healing, and personal growth ✔ Updated therapeutic insights and exercises to promote resilience, self-compassion, and emotional regulation ✔ Revised coping tools and reframing techniques to address the emotional and cognitive traps of alienation ✔ A more structured framework for parents (and therapists) to track patterns, healing, and progress Take a deep breath. You are not alone. Breathing Room is here to support you, offering space to grieve, reflect, and move forward with strength and hope. 🌷 amazon.com.au/dp/B0F1DS1DKJ/…

Holding space for you. Remember to look after yourself with lots of self-care and self-love. Reflect on those strong foundations you built with them... all that precious love and memories made together. Children get conflicted and stuck between your love and the other parents hate. Shine as bright as you can, so they gravitate towards you and see you for who you are.

I'm going through this and I'm female, haven't seeny children for 3 years, my ex lied about me and the wuest but is he even managed to convince me I wasn't worthy, I can't even afford to fight for mine, my eldest is so poisoned against me no point fighting, he's been brainwashed, :( btw I've never hurt my kids, I just had a breakdown from years of abuse

The Hidden Grief of Alienation Disenfranchised grief refers to any grief that goes unacknowledged or unvalidated by social norms. For alienated children and targeted parents, this grief is often minimised, dismissed, or misunderstood, making it even harder to process. Disenfranchised Grief 💔 Grief that is invisible to others, yet deeply painful for those experiencing it. For the Alienated Child: 🔹 Confusion & Internal Conflict – They may feel love for the targeted parent but are told they shouldn’t. 🔹 Suppressed Grief – They are not ‘allowed’ to miss or mourn the lost parent. 🔹 Guilt & Shame – They feel guilty for wanting a connection. 🔹 Distorted Reality – Their emotions are rewritten by the alienating parent’s narrative. 🔹 No Acknowledgment – The world assumes their rejection of the parent is their own choice. For the Targeted Parent: 🔹 Unrecognised Loss – Society and even professionals fail to see their grief as real. 🔹 Isolation & Silence – No mourning rituals exist for losing a child who is still alive. 🔹 Powerlessness – They are legally and emotionally blocked from reconnecting. 🔹 Endless Hope & Pain – Unlike death, there is no closure—just waiting, hoping, and hurting. 🔹 Stigma & Judgment – Assumptions like “They must have done something to deserve this” deepen the wound. Ambiguous Loss (Boss, 1999 & 2010) ⚖️ A loss without closure—one that leaves both the child and targeted parent stuck in limbo. For the Alienated Child: 🔹 They are physically present with the alienating parent but emotionally absent from their true self. 🔹 Their identity is fractured—forced to reject one parent to maintain loyalty to the other. 🔹 They grieve without understanding why—feeling an emptiness they can’t explain. For the Targeted Parent: 🔹 Their child is alive but unreachable, making the loss even more painful. 🔹 They experience ‘frozen grief’—unable to mourn, yet unable to move forward. 🔹 The trauma is externally caused—a senseless, imposed separation. This grief is real. It is not just a ‘phase’ or ‘alienated parents being dramatic.’ It’s a deep, lasting wound. Healing starts with awareness, connection, and the right support. You are not alone.

IT'S NOT JUST by Amanda Sillars, BPsycSc. It's not just loving one parent, it's the fear of expressing affection for the other. It's not just a difficult situation, it's the pressure to choose between the people I love most. It's not just loyalty, it's the manipulation that distorts genuine feelings. It's not just my parents disagreeing, it's one parent turning me against the other. It's not just my perspective, it's a view shaped by one parent's influence. It's not just a choice, it's the invisible pressure to conform to one parent's narrative. It's not just anger, it's the unexpressed grief for a lost relationship. It's not just my feelings, it's being told how I should feel about one of my parents. It's not just acceptance, it's the internal conflict between love and fear. It's not just what I see, it's a confusing picture painted by conflicting stories. It's not just my voice, it's the echo of someone else's words in my head. It's not just growing up, it's the development of a fractured sense of self. It's not just what I say, it's the fear of betraying one parent by loving the other. It's not just my family, it's a battlefield where I'm forced to choose sides. It's not just what I say, it's the unspoken words trapped within my heart. It's not just my reality, it's a distorted version created by someone else's pain. It's not just how I feel, it's a tangle of emotions I don't understand. It's not just my childhood, it's having my love for a parent manipulated and weaponized. @FCFCOA @MarkDreyfusKCMP @aifs_gov_au Research and Resources: bit.ly/EMMMResearchLi…

The tragedy of grandparent alienation is loss upon loss. When alienation keeps grandparents and grandchildren apart, time doesn’t wait. Many grandparents pass away before their grandchildren have the chance to reconnect, leaving behind unspoken words, unanswered questions, and irreversible loss. For children, the impact is profound. They lose stories, wisdom, and history—the roots that ground them. They miss out on unconditional love and belonging that only grandparents can give. They often don’t realise the depth of their loss until it’s too late. For grandparents, the pain is unbearable. Watching from a distance, hoping for a reunion that may never come. Mourning not just the lost years, but the memories that will never be made. Carrying their love to the grave, unheard and unseen. This is a tragedy of time, loss, and love stolen by alienation. No one should have to say goodbye without the chance to reconnect.

Parental alienating behaviour is endemic - BBC News When it comes to protecting children, facts matter. The first independent UK research report from UWL shows how prevalent alienating behaviours are in family breakdown. Time for change 👇 bbc.co.uk/news/articles/…

From early next year, journalists will be allowed to ask for permission to report on family court cases across England and Wales. Journalist Louise Tickle, who’s campaigned for the change, tells us why it’s so important.