Björn

Markus #Lanz zerlegt die SPD und ihre katastrophale politische Bilanz. Hunderttausende Industriearbeitsplätze WEG. Scholz = Wohlstandsverlust. Klingbeil = Stagnation. Bas = Rezession. Die Hälfte aller Bürgergeld-Empfänger hat keinen deutschen Pass. Kinder, die in der Grundschule nicht mal zwei Worte Deutsch sprechen. Um es klar zu sagen: Das ist die Bilanz EINER Partei. Der SPD. Seit 1998 fast durchgängig an der Macht. Die Partei, die sich Arbeiterpartei nennt, hat die Arbeiter verraten, die Industrie ruiniert und eine Bildungskatastrophe angerichtet, die uns eine ganze Generation kostet. Lanz hat ihr die Zahlen vorgelesen wie eine Anklageschrift. Und die SPD in Gestalt der EU-Politikerin Barley? Saß da. Stumm. Kein Widerspruch, kein Plan, kein Funken Einsicht. Nur LEERE. Die Wohlstandsvernichtungspartei Deutschlands hat NICHTS mehr zu sagen. Weil es nichts mehr zu sagen gibt!

THIS IS ACTUALLY CRAZY LIKE HE ATE THAT SO BAD OMFG😭???

The first time I abandoned a girlfriend in the mountains was an accident. We had an argument about something trivial, and she decided to go off on her own for a bit to cool down. I insisted she stick to the trail, but she said she didn’t need me mansplaining how to find her way in the woods. So I dropped it. How does one manage to get lost on a mountainside, anyway? You just walk downhill until you hit a switchback or reach the valley. Common sense stuff. Well, she managed it. When she didn’t turn up by nightfall, I contacted the ranger station and they set out to find her. By 1am, I got tired of waiting and drove home. They called the next morning to say they’d found her in a makeshift den she’d dug beneath a deadfall. She was naked, gone completely feral, her face painted with menstrual blood. A ranger tried to wrap a blanket around her shoulders, and she bit a golf ball-sized gobbet of flesh from his shoulder. So they sedated her and took her straight to the nearest hospital. That was three years ago and she still hasn’t recovered human language. Needless to say, I acquired a taste for it. I’m up to a baker’s dozen now, not counting the one that found her way back to the car before I could drive off. But you never forget your first. Sarah will always have a special place in my heart.

There's always the option not to do this

"Sexuelle Care-Arbeit" Dümmer wird es heute nicht mehr!

“Whoever can't name a football team starting with T drinks” My girlfriend: Tottenham Me: Toullouse My girl's gay bestfriend: Trabzonspor Me:

This was so good🫢😭

Clavicular kissed a married woman and didn’t even tell her he was streaming… the shock on her face when she realized she was live says it all 😬

Richtig so, Dieter 👍👍

Ese día Pedrito dejo de jugar Free Fire

Most Embarrassing Day of my Life 😭

finde das immer noch deutlich lustiger als ich sollte

@BlessingGives Gyokeres when he finally meets Sophie Rain:

wie ich als vierjähriger nachts in der tür meiner eltern stand um ihnen mitzuteilen dass ich mein bett geschissen habe

Estoy llorando a moco tendido con esto, se ha dejado el cuello el chaval

🚨#BREAKING: Watch as viral video captured in South London show squirrels vaping with discarded e-cigarettes, seemingly drawn in by the fruity scent after mistaking it for food.

Arsenal at the beginning of every tournament vs the end in a 10 secs video 😭