xxzarr

I'm Princess Pogle and it's my first birthday today. I want to be Prime Minister #leaderdebates. Free bones for everybody

Alconbury Conservative's set to decorate tree 4 Festival this weekend in Church. Fairy or angel? @David_Cameron

UKIP have made enquiries about hiring David Moyes. His experience at getting out of Europe has piqued their interest.

What's the difference between a politician and a thief? We only pay one of them to rob us.

Do you believe in democracy? 1) Yes 2) Absolutely 3) Of course

So David Cameron has visited Somerset. He's after the floating voters.

The people don't know their true power

Ed Balls has vowed to reintroduce the 50p tax rate for top earners, I must say, I'll sleep better on my park bench tonight knowing that.

Your only wish

It was so cold in London today I actually saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

90% of obese people have the fat gene which makes them eat crap food & sit around all day, the gene responsible is called 'Benefits'

Asked about his plans for the weekend, Ed Miliband said he wouldn't rule anything out but it was likely to remain between friday and monday

Merkel has called Obama to say "It is not acceptable for friends to spy on each other." well... that's what the NSA is saying she's said.

The NSA is mad at Edward Snowden & the US are calling for his extradition. They clearly didn't like it when he violated their privacy.

Chancellor George Osborne has said that the UK's economy is 'leaving intensive care'. If it's in an NHS hospital, we're buggered

Where do mythical creatures stand in the world of politics? Left of centaur.

5 happiest places to be 1: Benefit Office 2: immigration Advisory Off. 3: Welfare Off. 4: over-seas aid off. 5: PO collecting dole money

Disaster in Cyprus today, as the Government was turned down for a loan by Wonga,com

BBC SOURCES: coalition party to enforce garden tax on snowmen!

There hasn't been a new conspiracy theory for ages, I think the government is blocking them.