My favorite color is light tan. And my favorite animal, is puppies.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar
14.6K posts
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar
@pandaskitchen
Reformed picky eater, professional baker, general pain in the ass. She/her. Help me recipe test: https://t.co/HABUMTnErd
Oakland, CA Katılım Ağustos 2010
775 Takip Edilen303 Takipçiler
Ruined a possible first date I was sitting next to at the bar by calling out the dude's bs pro AI argument saying minorities directly benefited from using it to have the chance to get ahead. She was already heated and I know I just added fuel to her flame.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Made a giant pot of onion jam for one of the sandwiches we sell at the cafe, and now my entire being/essence is onion. I am onion.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar retweetledi
Brown/beige food, they'll never make me hate you. Lemony herby Royal Corona beans, pan roasted chicken drumsticks, and cabbage steaks cooked in the chicken pan drippings and chicken broth.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Turns out I don't have a cavity, I just need to actually wear my night guard. The more you know.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Tiny acts of harmless vandalism, really warms the heart.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar retweetledi
@LouisPisano This is killing me cause her actual vogue cover is tea Lmao
English
Thought I had some bloody cuts on my arms but turns out I'm just splattered in mixed berry jam.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
I'm not convinced that half of the drivers out on the roads nowadays actually know how to drive.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar retweetledi
Nosebleed weather in the bakery. What the fuck is 22% humidity?? Kill me!
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar retweetledi
my favorite boomer nostalgism is that food used to taste so much better. you are smoking crack ROCK you didn't even know to roast veggies until 1980
English
I have learned the best way to stop a possible fight is just start yelling like an aggressive P.E. teacher. "NO! STOP! NO SIR, CUT THAT OUT NOW!" saved Andrew from getting his ass beat not once, but twice.
✨dreamthem✨@gatx_negrx
Just witnessed the most AGGRESSIVE de-escalation of my life lmfao shoutout to New Yorkers who stop a fight by YELLING AT YOU POINT BLANK RANGE to STOP lol
Emeryville, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar retweetledi
once it hits 80 degrees, the Californian in me gets activated like a sleeper agent and i have to listen to Sublime.
English
@JenniferTilly in School Spirits was something I didn't know I needed but am better for having experienced. Mother.
Oakland, CA 🇺🇸 English
Amanda Body by Bread Salazar retweetledi
Weeks ago, we buried my father here.
Today, they bombed his grave. They bombed fucking graves!!!!
The audacity to call it a military target while the world is watching
lea@taylenarare
they bombed a funeral in lebanon at a cemetery and everyone is now dead. a fucking funeral at a cemetery.
English
The cheap gas is damn near 6 dollars, what the fucking fuck
Emeryville, CA 🇺🇸 English