z00p

I'm a piece of shit

So the first cycle left me constipated as fuck This go around got me purging my soul every two hours Just give me the insulin. I'm over this.

Calf raises make me shit

Im in Stage 7

I get my carabiners exclusively from lawyers

Me @ gym Bf: hey heres my tax stuff. Can you file ext or do my taxes? Plsthxkbye Me: cri

Woof

Me: i need to save monies Also me: buys hella juice, considering new truck for mother, contacted contractor for new house. Smh

Almost popped my ear buds into my mouth like m&ms. 'Mindfulness', my therapist says, 'work on it', he says Whoops

Topic to bring up at my next therapy session: whycome do i start fights when tings b good? Do i have my parents to thank for that???

Sitting in a meijer parking lot eating meijer sushi. Living the dream

Finally got around to eating the DQ ice cream i bought last week. Ow my tum tum

These cats. I don't think they like it when i snore. Constantly waking up with them either on my face and neck or with a dirty lil kitty mitt in my fucking mouth. Bastards.

@BigWillyGuyX Start saying dumb shit back. I hEv A BoYfrIeNd 'I have a rueben for lunch' Or 'I have a '23 sierra denali' Or 'I have pockets full of peanut butter' Just ya know, confuse em

@Styfe It was so cringe lmao. So insecure

Yesterday, a property manager and prospective tenet (girl) were waiting for the elevator. I walk into the vestibule with my groceries, manager asks “preparing for the big storm?” Me and property manager start talkin about the storm and this girl chimes in, unannounced and goes,

I'm concerned that doing roidies has improved my overall health. Like...apparently i had a wicked hormone imbalance...that my drs completely missed...Cool...i guess...🫠

@bigEasy93 @BigWillyGuyX Go pp on yourself next time, prove you were never interested. You must commit.

@BigWillyGuyX I’ve had the same thing happen to me lol I was working at an office building and had to piss so bad, first person I saw was some chick and I was trying to ask her where the bathroom was until she hit me with the same line 😂

Wake up, blood sugar too low Eat, too high Workout, too low Eat, too high One bell pepper for breakfast and lunch it is🙄🙄🙄

Damn, even in my dreams i shit talk Nissan. But am I wrong? Luv u Nissan, baby. I'll blow up yer gtr motor soon, promise.

The worst idea I've ever had was to have my two boyfriends meet...and i did many drugs I feel single when they hang out 😒

I. have. heart. burn. Dun dun dun dun. Dun. Dun. Dun. 🔥